On the Bridge

(ROBERT is sleeping.  There’s a KNOCK.  Nothing.  Another KNOCK.  ROBERT sits up in bed.  He looks at the clock.  He looks at the door.  Another KNOCK.  ROBERT gets out of bed, goes over to the door, and answers it.  We can’t see the person on the other side of the door yet.)

ROBERT:  Lore?

LORE:  Hey Rob.

ROBERT:  Is everything—

LORE:  Can I come in?

ROBERT:  It’s, like, three am—

LORE:  Should I go?

ROBERT:  No, no.  Just come in.

(ROBERT stands aside, and LORE enters the room.  She goes right to the bed and sits down.  ROBERT closes the door.)

ROBERT:  Do you want some, like, water, or—

LORE:  No, no, I’m—No.

ROBERT:  Okay.

LORE:  This is a nice room.

ROBERT:  Thanks.  They wanted me closer to the bridge.

LORE:  Oh right, your promotion.  Good for you.

ROBERT:  Thanks.

LORE:  I’d hate being close to the bridge.

ROBERT:  Well, it’s convenient for me, so—

LORE:  But does it make you nervous?

ROBERT:  Nervous?

LORE:  Yeah.

ROBERT:  Why would I be nervous?

LORE:  Because, you know, the bridge is where everything happens.

ROBERT:  Right.

LORE:  It’s just—I don’t know.  I don’t know what I’m saying.

ROBERT:  I work on the bridge.

LORE:  Yeah, I don’t know how you—I don’t know how you do that.

ROBERT:  Well, it’s what I’m trained to do.

LORE:  No, yeah, no…yeah.

ROBERT:  What’s going on with you?

LORE:  I had, uh…I had a dream.

ROBERT:  Okay.

LORE:  I had a dream we got blown up.

                (A beat.)

ROBERT:  Okay.

LORE:  And it—I mean, it was really real.

ROBERT:  Dreams can feel that way.

LORE:  And we just got into that fight a week ago.

ROBERT:  It wasn’t much of a fight.

LORE:  They hit us.

ROBERT:  They just got a few shots in.  There was barely any damage.

LORE:  Didn’t that guy Randy lose an arm?

                (A moment.)

ROBERT:  Well, you know I can’t talk about that.

LORE:  I’m just saying, that’s major.

ROBERT:  It’s—I really can’t talk about it, Lore.  I’m sorry.

LORE:  I’m just saying it’s something that would make people worry.

ROBERT:  If it happened.

LORE:  Did it…not happen?

ROBERT:  No, I—I really can’t say either way.

LORE:  What is that—like some Big Brother thing, or—?

ROBERT:  No, it’s just—there are reasons we can’t—there are reasons, but it’s not like we’re going to keep it, uh, what happened, you know—under wraps.  Forever.

LORE:  That’s…comforting.

ROBERT:  But you don’t have anything to be afraid of.  We beat—that other ship in the—skirmish.

LORE:  But they could have beat us.

ROBERT:  They really didn’t have the ability to do that.

LORE:  But what if we go against a ship that does?

ROBERT:  That’s where tactical maneuvering comes in.

LORE:  And if the other ship knows about tactical maneuvering?

ROBERT:  Then—I don’t know.  We out-maneuver their maneuvering.

LORE:  This isn’t funny.

ROBERT:  I’m not trying to be funny.  That’s a legitimate answer.

LORE:  That’s scary.  If that’s the best answer you have, that’s really—

ROBERT:  You should go back to your room.  Try to get some sleep.

LORE:  My roommate snores.  You’re so lucky you don’t have a roommate anymore.

ROBERT:  I had a roommate for a long time.

LORE:  I know.

                (A beat.)

ROBERT:  I’m sorry.  Of course you—of course you know.

LORE:  It’ll be two years in January.

ROBERT:  Do you ever have dreams about him?

LORE:  Not as often as I’d like.

                (A beat.)

ROBERT:  That was a freak accident, Lore.  It was—bizarre.  And nothing like it is ever going to happen again.

LORE:  Forgive me if I don’t find that soothing.

ROBERT:  No, of course you wouldn’t, I just meant—

LORE:  I mean, it doesn’t change—

ROBERT:  No, no, I know it doesn’t.

LORE:  But I—I do understand that it was…just a…an awful thing.

ROBERT:  It was.  And that fight with the other ship last week was an awful thing.

LORE:  Yeah, but that’s been happening more and more.

ROBERT:  We’ve been going through a rough territory.  Eta 7-1 is notoriously difficult to get across, but we’re only going to be stuck here for a couple more months.

LORE:  I looked up the statistics.

ROBERT:  What statistics?

LORE:  To see how many ships make it through Eta 7-1.

                (A beat.)

ROBERT:  Why would you look those up?

LORE:  They’re public record.  Anybody can.

ROBERT:  It just seems like a weird thing to do.

LORE:  Did you know about them?

ROBERT:  I knew…I had heard—

LORE:  One in three disappear.  One in three.

ROBERT:  I—those statistics are—they’re very unreliable.

LORE:  Robert, if three ships go in on a regular basis, and two ships come out on a regular basis—

ROBERT:  I don’t know how anybody could really measure that.

LORE:  What are you talking about?

ROBERT:  I mean, the lost ships could surface eventually—

LORE:  Eventually?

ROBERT:  --Or they could have wound up in a galaxy where communication is problematic.  We can’t assume that the ships just exploded.

LORE:  But they could have.

ROBERT:  I’m sorry, Lore, I really don’t do hypothetical’s.

LORE:  Did we blow up that other ship?

ROBERT:  What?

LORE:  The other ship.  Did we blow it up?

ROBERT:  We…responded.

LORE:  What does that mean?

ROBERT:  It means we took appropriate action.

LORE:  People saw them blow up.

ROBERT:  All I can say is that they were bad people, and they got—

LORE:  Bad people?  Really?

ROBERT:  If we hadn’t done—

LORE:  --Then they would have blown us up.

                (A beat.)

ROBERT:  You should go back to your room.  The doctor can probably give you something to help you sleep.

                (He goes to the door.  He opens it.)

I have an early day tomorrow, so…

LORE:  Okay.

                (She walks to the door, stops, and looks at him.)

Good luck on the bridge.

ROBERT:  (Smiles.)  Thank you.

(She exits.  He closes the door.  He goes over to his bed, sits, and covers his face with his hands.  He takes his hands away and tries to remember something, but he can’t.)

                End of Play

Tears Like Heartbeats

It’s okay to sit by a window

On a Saturday night

Waiting for a car to pull up

So your neighbors can see

And you can show off a little

But the clock sleeps in

And the butter melts

Without a name to call

Dust plays around

While a feeling sinks in

That you’re drinking

Next to kitchen ornaments

Tears like heartbeats

Drums like rain

Big old hope

Without a tattoo to its name

Long, long reasons

You can’t wait to hear

And tears like heartbeats

Nothing but

Blue-eyed excuses

Pretty boy smiles

Left side of bullshit

Right side’s fine

Brand new dresses

That fit just right

It’s okay to be lonely

On a Saturday night

You can go dancing if you want

You don’t need to wait around for me

I’m just waiting for the mood to strike

For when I wanna be seen

I got so many problems, honey

I lost count of myself

So better not count on me

All I’m gonna give you is

Tears like heartbeats

Bread for wine

Almost happy

And you’re almost mine

Backed up chances

Blown out love

Tears like heartbeats

What else you got but—

What’s the price?

What’s the price

Of paradise?

What’s the risk

In putting on new shoes

What’s the chance

Of not being chosen

Who else you going

Dancing with, huh?

Huh?

Who else you

Going dancing

With?

Tears, tears, tears

So much crying

I’m running out of paper

Ink runs

Down my face

A writer’s wrong

For every right

And so here I am

Trusting you

With my Saturday night

And you gave me—

Tears like heartbeats

Blue for grey

At a loss

I guess tears are what you pay

When you’re loving

Someone grey

Well, wrong or right

It’s just a Saturday

Night

Return to the Lie

So I know what we’re doing now

We’re returning to the lie

We tried the truth

It didn’t work

So now we’re going back

I won’t look at you

You won’t look at me

We’ll crack our half-laugh jokes

We’ll smile forgiving smiles

We’ll bribe ourselves with calendars

Two more days, two more weeks

Then we’ll make a change

You’ll get home at seven

I’ll get home at six

Pizza Mondays

Take-out Tuesdays

And grilled whatever

The rest of the week

Have I gained weight?
Have you lost hair?

No

No

We’re pecks on the cheek

And clothes from last week

Did we wash them?
Who cares

It’s not like they went anywhere

But we have our secret weapons

That we keep tucked away

The attitude lurks

In the bottom of compliments

And bottles of wine

The extended sighs

The rolling eyes

The letting go

Of things

That used to make us fight

Why fight now?
What for?
For what?

To get some kind of closure

On why you did this

And why I did that

I did that because I’m me

And you did this because you’re you

Or maybe I’m how I am because of you

Because I’m with you

And maybe it’s the same

The other way around

Blame gets left on the counter

Right next to our keys

And each of us

Keeps forgetting

Where we put it

The faucets stay running

The lights stay on

The locks unlocked

The doors ajar

Welcoming in

Whatever kind of trouble

We could get ourselves in

But even trouble doesn’t want

Anything to do with us

Trouble went to the house next door

And took that old man

And his lovely old wife

They died together

In the very same bed

A day apart?
Two days?

Who knows?

Maybe it happened

All at once

Wouldn’t that be kind?

I get the feeling

Death will not be that kind

To us

Because even if you died next to me

I’d still die alone

Alone and lonely

Because the only thing

Keeping me company

Was a lie

A you-shaped lie

That I put myself

In the middle of

A bargain I made

That kept me just happy enough

To never move

To never leave

To never shift

To never shout

To never pout

To never pray

For anything better

Because I’ve seen worse

All my life

But I could see better

Across the street

For a night, we did it

We said what we said

We dropped glass on the floor

And stepped on it

We threw out food

That wasn’t bad

We bumped our heads

On the low-hanging fruit

We burned down the candles

And filled up the sink

Smeared jelly on our faces

Poured shampoo on the bed

No going to sleep

Until this was worked out

And the lie was showed outside

Until we did

But…

It got cold outside

And we felt bad

For ourselves

And so we invited the lie

Back inside

And it lives on the floor

And it lives in our mouths

And it lives in the attic

And it stays on the couch

And we keep it

Protect it

It’s ours

It’s the only thing

We agree on

It’s the only thing
We’ve made

That never seems

To break

So here we are

Knowing what we know

Knowing too much

Knowing everything

But the things we need to know

Oh well.

It’s colder outside, right?

That’s what they tell me

That’s what I imagine

They’d say