To tell you the truth
You can believe that it won’t lie to you
But that doesn’t mean it has to tell you everything
I ask to see you
They say you’re here
But you’re not here
‘Not in this exact spot?’
Heaven, the cloud says, is a very large place
Funny, because I always thought of Heaven
As being exclusive
And so, tiny
Miniscule, really
Since it seemed that so few of us
Would actually see it
But it turns out that the Lord is forgiving
And so Heaven is a landscape
More vast than Earth
And so ‘lost’—
A concept we the living
Have given up
--Lost is something that now only exists in Eternity
Someone can be in the same place as us
And nowhere near us
I thought Heaven was for the happy, I say
And the cloud says—
Happy, maybe, but not ecstatic
Certainly not entertained
You’re at peace is all
Isn’t that enough?
But I’m bored
I don’t say that
But it’s how I feel
I’m bored in Heaven
And I thought I was going to see you here
I was buried on a Saturday
In my Sunday best
My hair was done just right
A hint of a smile crept upon my lips
And nothing the undertaker did
Could seem to fix it
People wept on me
They touched me
One even took my photo
And I lay there imagining you
Feeding me apple slices
Walking with me to the market
Throwing down your key
You’re here, the cloud says
And you’re everywhere
And individuality is a luxury
That you’ll grow to forget
I pictured Heaven like a Cab Calloway dance number
White steps
Top hat
A cane
A tap number
I thought I’d be tapping with you
I try and get a sense of my feet again
So I can tap one
Knock it off, the cloud says
Then goes back to hovering
Over a child’s birthday party
I let go of my feet
But not my fingers
I wiggle one
Then another
I feel a light touch
On my thumbnail
And I know it’s you
I don’t know how
But I know it is
The cloud breaks up
And I close my hand
The smile returns
To where my lips used to be
And Heaven grows
A little smaller
A little closer
Together
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