The First Dress

-- The first ever dressmaker monologue --

"The First Dress"

Make the neckline plunge lower
Might as well let the husband
Know he made the right choice

Oh, she won’t mind
I went to high school with her
She was never happy just entering the room
She wanted the room to enter her

It’s a beautiful dress, isn’t it?

I love working with fabric like this
It makes working feel like playing
I was going to use this fabric on my dress

My hypothetical dress, of course
I’m speaking very broadly
I certainly wouldn’t be able to have a plunging neckline
I don’t have that kind of chest
With my chest a plunging neckline
Would be a lethal weapon

The sides would have to be taken out—-
Otherwise I’d end up looking like a deformed hourglass

My hair would have to come down over my shoulders
My arms need to be covered—-
I don’t like my arms

But it could still be a nice dress

And I wouldn’t charge myself much, obviously...

. . . . .

I did make a dress once that I was...fond of, once

The bride liked it
But she thought it was too old-fashioned
She wanted something more modern
So I left it in the corner for a couple of weeks
And just glanced over at it from time to time

Then one day...

I slipped it on...

And it looked nice

My shoulders
My arms
My waist

It all sort of....

...Fit.

It made me feel sexy

It may have been old-fashioned
But I felt new in it

And to think something I made
Something that came from my head
My imagination
Could make me feel so good

I never thought I would be the one
To make myself feel that good

I couldn’t have felt any better
If there was a man standing next to me in a cream-colored tux

Or maybe beige

Hmm…It looks good.

It’ll look good on her

The beads around the wrist might look tacky
But that’s fine, I guess

She’s a little tacky herself

And if she doesn’t like it...

I’ll just put it in the corner

...For another day.