Here on the Island

Here on the island

I have coconuts

And I’m really not sure

Why I should leave

The other people

The ones who survived the crash

They got on this little boat

And sailed away

And I just wanted to ask them—

What are you sailing back to?

Bills?

Mortgages?
Student loans?

I didn’t say anything

Because it’s really none of my business

And also

I wanted the island to myself anyway

It’s been a lot quieter around here

Without all the crying

And talking about relatives back home

You know who I have back home?

A cousin with a Percocet addiction

And an older brother

Who sells those fake kids

You put out in front of your house

So the real kids don’t get run over

I’m good where I’m at

They won’t miss me

And I won’t miss them

Besides, people may thousands of dollars

To go to islands like this one

And not worry about anything

I got here for free

And I’m never going to have to worry about anything

For the rest of my life

Except for getting sick

Of eating coconuts

But I’ll get over that

I could learn how to hunt

But so far the only thing

I’ve found on the island

Is this one armadillo

With a bad leg

And the thought of eating him

Is enough to make me

Go vegetarian

He walks by me sometimes

At night

When I’m sitting by my fire

Watching the waves

Come up to the place

Where the beach meets the forest

I like to see how long I can sit there

Before the water reaches

My toes

I don’t know how long I can stay here

Before I die of something or other

But the way the world was going

When I left

I think predicting how long

Any of us are going to be around

Is a pretty big waste of time

I say just sit on the beach

And enjoy yourself

Just don’t sit too close

To the wreckage

Because the smell of gasoline

Is still pretty potent

And I had a hallucination

That my dead uncle

Was running through the forest

Chasing that poor armadillo

But then again

Maybe he was

Everybody has to find

Their own little place

In the world

And until I landed her

I wasn’t sure

I’d find mine

I was never a city girl

Because there was too much

Going on

But the country

Made me nervous

And the suburbs

Made me depressed

I never thought of an island

But I was probably scared

Of how lonely I would be

Then when I crashed here

I realized that it takes so much work

To not be lonely

It’s what I’ve been working at

My whole life

Maybe this was

Somebody’s way of telling me

That I needed to just…

Dig into it

Stay here

With just myself

And my coconuts

And find some way

To be happy about it

Nobody’s promised

A life full of people

You get what you came with
And usually

That’s you

So I’m here

And I’m alive

And I’m not going anywhere

But that’s fine

It’s fine

Because it has to be fine

Funny how nice it is

Not to have worry

About how you should feel

About your situation

Funny how nice it is

To just sit on the beach

And watch the beach

Become the ocean

If the Shoe Fits

I’m not here to tell you

How to raise your kid

But I will say

That you’re doing it wrong

I raised all those kids

With no rooms

No beds

Nothing but a shoe

And only a handful of them

Turned out to be serial killers

I mean, just three or four

Really turned out messed up

But the rest

Are truly wonderful people

Jerry, he used to love

Just sitting on the shoelaces

Falling asleep out there

Even in the rain

In the snow

During a blizzard

You couldn’t get him

Off the shoelaces

He disappeared about ten years back

And I haven’t heard from him since

But I figure if he lived through all that

He can handle himself

Out there in the world

And that’s parenting

You raise ‘em in a shoe

You feed them when you can

You try not to name them anything stupid

And if you’re lucky

They don’t get eaten by wolves

As soon as they leave the sole

Now, as far as I know

I’ve raised the last of my kids

Two left last week

And I know there was one in the heel

But I heard a door open and close last night

So I think I’m in the clear now

Oh sure, some come back and visit

And when they do

Sometimes they stay for a year or two

But as far as any actually living here

Permanently

I think those days are over

It doesn’t hurt that most of them

Didn’t really enjoy

Living in a shoe

They used to beg me

To move them into a house

And I used to say to them--

‘Do you know how much houses cost?’

And that usually shut them up

For a few minutes

Until they started asking

About a house again

I was fine in the shoe

A home isn’t supposed to be perfect

It’s just supposed to stop you

From freezing to death

In the winter

You know how well insulated

Giant shoes are?

Pretty well insulated

I’ll tell you that

I don’t remember being cold once

When we lived in that shoe

The tuna can on the other hand…

Those were rough times

That was back when I had a husband

He liked cans

I liked shoes

And you can’t really get past those differences

Even when you have a few dozen kids to consider

I liked being a mom

He liked being an asshole

And we split the difference

I got the kids

He got a train ticket

And I think everything worked out all right

Aside from the serial killers

But you know

Statistically

There was no way I was having that many kids

Without a few of them

Murdering people

It’s just not possible

You give them love

And you get them

The hell out of the shoe

So they can give it

To somebody else

Now you’re giving your kids a lot

Phones

Computers

Computers on their phones

But are you giving them love?

If not, you should be careful

Because it’s one thing to raise sixty kids

And have a few of them turn out bad

But when you only have two or three

And those turn out bad?

Well…

Then you really need to ask yourself

If there was a problem

At home

Little Known Fireworks

I got my best kiss

During some

Little known fireworks

Pops and bangers

And the hood of my car

Was nice and cool

Because it was hot out

That night

It’s usually hot

By the time we have the church festival

And I wasn’t planning on going

But my girlfriend said

Jim would be there

And that was all it took

To get me off my rear end

And into the car

The rule about the church festival is

You’re going to see at least ten people you don’t like

As soon as you get there

There’s this one and that one

And you gotta fight your way through a crowd

Before you finally get to a friend

Or somebody you can talk to

For a few minutes

Before you go get something to eat

Or just stand around drinking

Wondering when you can go home

There’s not a lot to do around here

The city’s only ten minutes away

But people like to stay close to home

Even when home ain’t all that nice

Jim was flipping burgers

And when he caught my eye…

I just sort of smiled

Because I always liked him

Since we were at school together

And I think--

I think maybe I’d said two words to him

Before that

But sometimes you just get to an age--

I was almost forty

And had a divorce behind me

And it’s like--

What do I have to worry about

When it comes to--

When it comes to men, you know?

I had two teens at home

A girl and a boy

And I had no time for shyness

I can tell you that

The way I look at it

If somebody likes you

There’s no shame

In letting it be known

But I also know

That people are usually smarter

Than everybody gives them credit for

And I knew Jim could see my face

And knew what I was thinking
And that he’d find me

If he wanted to find me

And it turns out he did

But see, I wasn’t at the big fireworks spot

In front of the supermarket

I sat on the hood of my car

Behind the old fire station

And Jim found me anyway

He turned off his car

And came to sit on the hood of mine

That was nice

I liked that

You can see the fireworks just as good

From that spot

But most people don’t know about it

I’d been going there since I was in high school

Because I followed Jim there one night

And saw him kissing this girl

Who I didn’t think was all that pretty

Not sure what ever happened to her

We talked a little bit

He and I

He asked about my kids

I asked about his mom

Who he takes care of

And then we just watched the fireworks

Not any big story to tell you

But it was a nice time

Even though I didn’t want to go

The friend who invited me

Got drunk and went home

With this girl who does tattoos

In her living room

And she said she had a great time

And asked me what I got up to

I told her

I watched the fireworks

And I wasn’t lying

Not everybody

Needs to know everything

You know

Sometimes it’s nice

To keep something

To yourself

I Don't Believe in Anything But Heaven

I don’t believe in

What you think

Might be coming for me

Here on earth

There is nothing here on earth

Just salt and grime

And some crops

To harvest

But nothing I need to be afraid of

I speak to the Lord

I know the Lord’s language

And what he says to me

Leads me to believe

That I don’t need to be afraid

Of you

Or your chains

Or your bondage

There is joy and justice

In Heaven

And in Heaven only

And so nothing short of Heaven

And my right to enter it

Is going to send me

Towards any grief

Over what I have to

While I’m on an earthly plane

Do you understand what I’m saying?

Now they’re talking about

The kidnapping

And whether or not what we did--

What you have to get--okay

What you have to get about this

Is that--

You’re looking at it

Like an innocent pregnant girl

And her kidnapping

But it’s about murder

You can’t--

What I’m trying to say is--

You can’t just call her

An innocent pregnant girl

Because she had no desire

To be pregnant

And if we hadn’t of taken her

She wouldn’t be pregnant right now

And that was my son’s baby

That he had rights to

And she didn’t give a damn about that

And neither did anybody else

And I think that’s wrong

I’m sorry, but I think that’s just wrong

So we took her

Me and my husband

We took her

And we weren’t going to hurt her

Nobody was going to get hurt

Except for that baby

If we let her go

And as soon as she was--

It wasn’t cheap either

Just so you know

Taking care of her

All those months

Keeping like that

It wasn’t cheap

Or easy

I’ll tell you that

And we never asked for any--

And no, I don’t feel badly

For her parents

Because they were going to just

Let her do it

They didn’t care

When she was ready

We took her to the hospital

And that was that

And now we got a baby

And she seems pretty happy

With that baby

If you go by the, uh, pictures

You see on the computer

She doesn’t seem all that upset

That we made her

Have that baby

Instead of murdering it

So I don’t know

What the crime is here

I really don’t

But you can’t tell me

What’s wrong and what isn’t

No man or woman

On this earth can

Only God can do that

And he’s going to be waiting for me

When I get to Heaven

To thank me

For what I did

I believe that

I believe in that and Heaven

I don't believe in anything but Heaven