You Won't Find A Better Man

Nicolette,

Wow

Well…

Well, what I’ll say is--

You won't find

A better man

Not that there aren’t

Better men

It’s just that

You won't...find them

But they’re out there

But you don’t know those men

You know this man

And so he--

Is the best man

You’ll ever find

Now...if you were…

I don’t know

Someone else

Someone...better

Maybe you would be able

To meet

A better man

But you are...you

And so…

This man

Right here

Is the best man

Well, not the best man

He’s the groom

But--

You know, actually

The best man here

Is a great man

He’s great

But you, uh--

You can’t really--

I don’t think he’d be--

I mean, even if you didn’t

Just marry his best friend

I don’t think

He would have been a, uh--

A man you could...find

I mean, he’s right there

But I don’t think

He would want you

To, uh, find him

Which is fine!

Because you found Eric instead

And Eric is the best man for you

We all agree on that

Everyone here

Agrees

That you two

Have found each other

And that it was for the best

That neither one of you

Found anybody else

Well, Eric found his first wife

And she then found a better man

She was able

To, uh, find

A better man

And that’s because Eric
Was not the best man

For her

Whereas he is for you

And that’s how love works

It’s all about

Who you can find

And whether or not

They want to find you

And luckily you and Eric

Found each other

And there’s nobody better for him
And there’s definitely nobody better

For you, Nicolette

Uh…

So let’s all raise our glasses

To the happy couple

Because happiness

Is so important

And finding happiness

With the people

You can make happy

And who will try really hard

To make you happy

And I’m sure

They’re going to do their best

And that’s what’s important

Also, Nicolette, I would not go

Googling Eric at any point

If you haven’t already

Hahahahaha

Just focus on each other

And how lucky you are

Lucky, lucky, lucky

And all of us are lucky

That whereas before

We were your friends

And your family members

And support system

And the people you called screaming

At four in the morning

After being arrested

For public intoxication

Now, we’re all off to the side

And you two

Have each other

Cheers