Let's Associate

Tom
Laura

--  A bedroom .  They sit on the bed, cross-legged, facing each other. --

Laura:  You're doing it wrong.

Tom:  How do you know?

Laura:  You're thinking about it.

Tom:  Yeah, so?

Laura:  You're not supposed to think.

Tom:  You have to think.

Laura:  Not that much.

Tom:  How much are you supposed to think.

Laura:  Just enough to get the word.  Let your self-conscious do the work.

Tom:  And what do we learn from this?

Laura:  Things.  We learn things.  Deep, subconscious things that we'd never learn if we, you know--

Tom:  Talked like normal human beings?

Laura:  Exactly.

Tom:  Okay.  Fine.

Laura:  You ready?

Tom:  Ready.

Laura:  Walnut.

Tom:  What?

Laura:  Walnut.

Tom:  Laura--

Laura:  What?

Tom:  Walnut?

Laura:  Yeah, walnut.

Tom:  What am I supposed to do with walnut?

Laura:  It's not a toy, Tom.  You don't play with it.  You respond to it.  It's a word.

Tom:  Walnut?

Laura:  Well, now I have to pick another one because you've been thinking--

Tom:  No, I want to do walnut.  You gave me walnut.  Let me do that one before you give me another one.

Laura:  Okay, fine--walnut.

Tom:  Allergy.

Laura:  Oh my God.

Tom:  What?

Laura:  You have a nut allergy.

Tom:  Exactly.

Laura:  So don't say allergy because you have a nut allergy.  A walnut isn't even a nut.

Tom:  It isn't?

Laura:  No.

Tom:  I think it is.

Laura:  It's a--a--something else.

Tom:  You're thinking of a pecan.

Laura:  No, I think a pecan IS a nut.

Tom:  But a walnut isn't?

Laura:  That's why it's so--okay, too much.  Too much thinking.

Tom:  I wasn't think.  You said 'nut,' I said 'allergy.'

Laura:  Try to disassociate.

Tom:  Disassociate?

Laura:  So that you can come up with something interesting.

Tom:  But we're doing word associations.

Laura:  But I'm trying to learn new things about you.  I already know you're allergic to nuts.

Tom:  Fine.  Give me another one.

Laura:  Brisbane.

Tom: What?

Laura:  Sorry.

Tom:  Isn't that in Australia?

Laura:  I wasn't thinking.

Tom:  So you were doing it right?

Laura:  No.

Tom:  You were doing it right and you came up with Brisbane?

Laura:  No, I was doing it wrong.  I'm supposed to think.  You're not supposed to think.

Tom:  Well, let me give you a word then.  I'm better at thinking.

Laura:  You can give me a word after you do it right.

Tom:  Well, why don't you demonstrate to me how to do it right?

Laura:  Okay, give me a word.

Tom:  Pop.

Laura:  No.

Tom:  'No''s your word?

Laura:  No, I mean, give me another word.  'Pop' is stupid.

Tom:  Why is it stupid?

Laura:  What am I going to do with 'pop?'

Tom:  What was I supposed to do with 'walnut?'

Laura:  Never mind.  Just give me another one.

Tom:  No, do 'pop' then I'll give you another one.

Laura:  Fine.

Tom:  Pop.

Laura:  Stupid.

Tom:  No--

Laura:  That's my word.  Stupid.  I hear 'pop' and the first thing I think of is 'stupid.'

Tom:  I don't want to play anymore.

Laura:  We're not playing.  This is a deep, personal, psychological exercise.  Now give me another word.

Tom:  Snap.

Laura:  Stupid.

Tom:  Ugh!

Laura:  One more!

Tom:  Melbourne!

Laura:  I give up.

The End