Today I Stopped

Today I stopped

I quit

I gave it up

I threw it away

I tore up the number
That I wrote
On sheet metal

I burned the pack

I poured out the booze

I apologized

I gave away my shit

I acknowledged my shit

I stopped rolling around in my shit
Like a pig
With a personality disorder

I ripped my shirt off

I stopped saying nasty things to myself

I stopped saying nasty things altogether

I ate cake

I stuffed my face
With cake

Then I put the cake away

I looked in all my mirrors

I dug up the grave
I danced on the grave
I prayed on the grave
I played on the grave
I stayed on the grave

That grave belonged to me
And today it's just grass
With a stone on top

I paid all my bills

I wrote down my thoughts

I forgave myself

I forgave everybody else

I unpacked my boxes

I phoned my mother

I made bread

I screwed up
I screwed up
I screwed up

And I started

I started

And I failed
And I suck
And I'm wrong
And I'm worthless
And I'm mean
And I'm an asshole
And I should die

But instead

I'll stop

I'll just stop

And start again