Endgame

Beau took off for Hollywood

In the middle of our tenth season

He had this crisis

Where he thought he could be a movie director

And a friend got him a job

Working on this independent movie

So for the last part of the season

We didn’t have an Artistic Director

While he was gone

The biggest jerk in the company

Got even worse

Beau’s wife could keep the jerk in check up to a point

But for the most part

He did whatever he wanted

And that spring

He decided that I was going to be

His punching bag

It all started because we were finishing the season with Endgame

And he thought I was an idiot

Because I didn’t know what it was about

I still don’t know what it’s about

It’s Beckett!

The wonderful thing about Beckett

Is that the less you try to understand it

The more enjoyable it is

Sort of like my mother

She didn’t want me to be an actress

She thought men would take advantage of me

She’s right, in a way

I mean…

They did try

Mr. Lead Actor tried

Beau’s wife told me the only reason he was even in the company

Was because he had something on Beau

I just knew he was an awful person

But the then one day

After a matinee performance of Endgame

He asked me if I got the play yet

I said—‘No’

And I heard him mumble something under his breath

I asked him what he said

And he looked right at me

And said—

‘That’s because you’re stupid.’

You know what my mother used to say?

She used to say

There’s a difference

Between stupid and crazy

And she was right

Because as soon as the play had finished its run

I went back in the dressing room

Where Mr. Fancy Actor was

And I shot him

Everyone else was gone

Again, crazy

Not stupid

I took him out back

And chopped him up

Then left him in a different few dumpsters

And called it a night

Nobody ever found out it was me

And I died a year ago

At what they used to call

‘A ripe old age’

It feels good to confess after all these years

Not because I feel badly about what I did

But because when you do theater

You know how important a good ending is

To anything

And I’d say this is a pretty good ending

Wouldn’t you?