Maxwell Plays Guitar

Maxwell plays guitar

And I’m drunk

And twenty-three again

I got my leg

Kicked up

On a stone wall

Near Byson-Wickman

The mosquitoes bite

The crickets chirp

And the guitar sounds like

Two people trying to sort it out

With Guinness and a few cigarettes

Maxwell comes from the town

Where my cousin lives

And he taught himself guitar

After his father died

When he was ten

The guitar belonged to his father

And his mother said--

‘Have it’

Like it was something

She would have thrown out otherwise

He taught himself a lot of things

Including how to take care of her

The first job he ever had

Was janitor at the high school

He dropped out of

And that was how I met him

I was there for the state science fair

With my project on ponds and lakes

And Maxwell caught my eye

Going into one of the bathrooms

I tried not to smile

And he tried not to see me

Trying not to smile

And the next thing I knew

I was in the bathroom

Getting kissed in front of a dirty mirror

With the words ‘Fuck off’ written in what looked like lipstick

Which is odd

Since it was the men’s room

A month later

It was summer vacation

And Maxwell had plans

To go to London

He wasn’t telling his mother

And he was sure that without him

She wouldn’t be around very long

In a way, he was sort of

Already grieving her

And grieving for his dad

And for a part of himself

Now that he'd made up his mind

To be an orphan

I tried to think of profound things to say

But nothing made more sense

Than the silence

So I just sat there

Listening to his guitar

And the crickets

Twenty years later

I’m in London

And I’m eating with my guy

At this overrated French place we go to

When we want to feel the weight of our wallets

And get drunk on nice wine

So we won’t have to think about

How much we fucking hate each other

In the corner of the restaurant

There’s a little stage

Where they bring in people

To play guitar

And that night

There was Maxwell

Looking older

But then again

I probably looked older than him

At that point

He caught my eye

And he knew

Started singing the song

From the stone wall

That summer evening

And I found myself

Holding my glass to my lips

But not drinking

My guy must have said something

Because I put the glass down

And excused myself from the table

A few minutes later

Maxwell and I

Were in the bathroom

Kissing in front of a very clean mirror

And thank god the man who hands you the towels

Was having a smoke

Because I’m not sure

It would have mattered to me

If he watched

While we were kissing

I made the mistake

Of opening my eyes

And got a good look at myself

In the mirror

There was a man

Who’s not young

But not old yet either
Because he doesn't have any wisdom

Which is almost worse

A man in that middle place

Trying to take a few steps back

But I didn’t stop

I just kept going

And Maxwell did too

We went on and on

And it was almost ridiculous

That nobody else came in

And my guy didn’t come looking

And the manager didn’t come looking for Maxwell

And that the world turned and turned

And just let us have this moment

Until we were done with it

We didn’t stop

We couldn’t stop

I honestly don’t know what

Could have made either of us

Stop