Chicken Soup for Grownass Men

I guess I need to make you

Chicken soup

Even though

And here’s the thing—

You’re a grownass man

You’re a grownass man

Who needs chicken soup

Nothing wrong with that

I mean, there are things wrong with it

But nothing I care to bring up

Right now

You think I’ve never made

Chicken soup

For a grownass man before?

Try again

I’ve made pots

Of it

Pots and pots

Buckets of it

So I’m happy to do it

It’s not about that

It’s that you’re sitting there

On the couch

Flipping through channels

And the tv isn’t on

So I have to imagine

That something

Is very wrong here

Now, do you want me

To give you advice

Or sit down next to you

And pretend

I’m watching invisible tv too?

Because I can do that

I can do all sorts of things

Juggle

Tap dance

Make soup

Whatever you want

But do you know what you want?

That’s the question

You want a book of stories

All about grownass men like you

And how they’re hurt?
How they’re suffering?
How their lives are hard

And nobody gets it?

Because I can write you that book

Chapter One:  I’ve Had It Easy and I Didn’t Know It

Chapter Two:  My Father Got to Fuck Up and I Don’t

Chapter Three:  I Sexually Harassed a Woman and Instead of Rolling Her Eyes She Kneed Me in the Groin

I can write chapter after chapter

All about grownass men

Just

Like

You

Or you can get up off the couch

And turn off the tv that isn’t on

And make your own damn

Chicken soup

You know where the kitchen is

You know where the chicken is

And I’m assuming you know

How to boil water

But if you don’t

I’m sure

You’ll figure it out

Here’s something you need to know—

And I can put this in the book

If you want me to

The thing is—

Time exists whether or not

You own a clock

You know what I mean by that?

If you don’t

You will

Or you won’t

But part of you

Some part

Will get it

Eventually

Because no matter how dumb you are

Shit sinks in

It always finds a way

To sink in

The same way

You’re sinking into

Those sofa cushions

My words

Will land on you

Somehow

Yes, you are special

But you are special

Because everybody is special

And you are no more special

Than anybody, okay?

Let that sink in

Let it land

Try to, at least

At least

Try to

Okay?

Because you’re not sick

You’re just grown

And there’s not enough soup in the world

To fix that