What You Do Well

The first movie I did
Was this really stupid
Romantic comedy

And it hit
It hit really big
And it was, like, okay--choices

I could do another romantic comedy
And risk everybody pigeonholing me
Or I could do something totally different

So I did a horror movie
And everybody said--
'Oh!  Why?  Do another romantic comedy!'

But I was like--Huh?
The horror movie made money
I mean, it made money...in Singapore

It didn't flop
Not really
It did well!--in Spain

Like, one of the top three movies of the year
In Spain
Top five in England

British people don't just love anything, you know
So I was like, 'No, I branched out
And I'm going to keep doing it'

So I did this really dramatic movie
And that tanked
I mean, I can't even spin that--it just tanked

And then I was sort of panicking
But I thought--No, it's okay
Comedy's your thing

That doesn't mean you have to make bad comedies
It doesn't mean you have to continue making
The same movie over and over again

So I made a dark comedy
And it bombed
Even bigger than the dramatic movie

So at that point, I'm thinking
Okay, enough screwing around
I'm going back to romantic comedy

If that's what they want
That's what they want
So I did a romantic comedy

But at that point
It just seemed desperate
Like--Oh sure, you're doing that now because it's all you CAN do

So basically
I was faulted
For doing what everybody wanted me to do
Because I did other stuff in between

How it works is
You find something you're good at
And then you either milk it to death
While people look on in disdain

Or you try different things
And people suggest you go back to doing what you were originally doing
So they can say you're milking it
And look on in disdain

When what it all really comes down to is
If you do something well
There's always going to be some asshole
Who doesn't do anything well
And wants to be pissed at you

I wish somebody had told me that
Three movies ago