Joey in the Kitchen

Hi Dad?

Dad, it's me

Joey

Yeah, I know you're at work

But I just have a quick question--

Mom told me that I'm lazy
And need to learn to do things on my own
So I told her I was going to make my own dinner tonight

Little problem:

I'm not sure what the stove is...

Well, I google imaged it
But nothing that came up
Looked like anything we have in here

So then I google imaged oven
But nothing came up

'U-H-V-E-N'

Ohhhhh...

'O-V-E-N'

Well, where were you
Five hours ago, Dad?

No, I CAN'T use the microwave
I want to make a Thanksgiving turkey

Because Mom thinks I'm an idiot who can't cook
So I'm going to make the hardest thing you can make

Well, I was going to make a souffle
But I couldn't spell that either
And recipes dot com doesn't have a spell check

I have to cook it for HOW long?

What if I turn the oven up REALLY high?

Dad, if you cook it at twice the temperature
It'll cook faster

No wonder I flunked math in junior high
YOU were the one doing my homework

Can't I just put it in the crock pot?
I got stuff to do today

Dad, you can make anything in a crock pot
Even I know that

I've got pancake batter in there right now

Well, I had to eat breakfast before I could have lunch!

You know what, never mind

I'll just order something from the Italian place next door
And scoop it out onto plates
Like you did on your anniversary
When you told Mom you were slaving away all day
In the kitchen

You keep my secrets, old man
I'll keep yours

All right, fine, go back to work
I gotta call 'Anthony's' and get the dinner special

Do you know the number?

Never mind I'll look it up in the phone book

'Anthony' ends with a 'y,' right?

See?

I'm not that stupid