Lost on a Map

I had all the places in front of me

And I was lost

I had the names of the countries

The cities

The places that were available to me

All these locations

And I could go anywhere

It felt…

It felt like an old song

An old song with lyrics

About freedom

And how it’s a trap

There I am

With everything I need

To be the next person

All my life

I’ve been this person

And I saw everyone around me

Going to the next

And the next

And the next

This time I wanted to be the next

But all this time

I was under the map

Looking at the underside of oceans

Reaching up to touch

The bottom of continents

Sure that when I got up there

I would know exactly where it was

I needed to go

And now…

I take a step

I fall off the edge

I take another step

I’m back on the curve

Right before the sunlight hits it

I take one more step

And I’m back where I started

It’s that thing

Where you think

There’s a wrong road

And a right road

And really

There’s no road at all

Your feet touch down on gravel

No signs

No arrows

No indication

That you’re walking

Into the darkness

Or towards the light

I hear a car coming towards me

Then it’s a train

Then a pair of feet

Feet on sand

Which you can’t hear at all

But you can see the footprints

Near you

And away from you

I find a mountain

I find a lake

I find a cluster of houses

Where dinner is being served

And nobody thinks there’s much

To think about

Beyond their cul-de-sac

There’s nothing about me

That’s very large

I could get lost

Just about anywhere

Even with everything

In my favor

Sometimes the more you give

People like me

The more we find to lose

I’m the one you step over

And step by

And step around

To get where you’re going

There’s no reason

There’s no reason I can’t do it too

But no matter how many reasons there aren’t

There’s still a block

There’s still an obstacle

There’s still something
In my way

I thought it was as simple

As what you could access

I never knew that it still comes down

To what you’ve got behind you

That you need to move on from

That you need to leave

That you need to not need anymore

I take a step

I’m still...

I take another step

I’m still…

I take another step

And the light hits the curve

The day’s over

And I have to decide

What to name

The place

In front

Of me