Bebe the Intergalactic Ballerina

The thing to remember is--

And I say this to little Faith all the time

The thing to remember is
That it's not about the dancing

Some ballerinas--that are not intergalactic ballerinas--will tell you
That it's about the dancing

And those ballerinas
Are ugly

They're ugly ballerinas
Because all they care about
Is the dancing

I don't think about the dancing at all
And that's why I'm the best intergalactic ballerina that ever lived

And that's why everyone loves me
Even the ugly people
That don't understand
Why I'm so fantastic

They adore me
Everybody does

Even the Pozars from the Zuwhar Galaxy love me
And they eat their own mothers
As soon as they're born

The trick is not to think about it
Not to think about any of it

The other day, I was in school with Faith
As I usually am
Because what else am I doing
During the day
Besides trying not to stare at myself
In the mirror all day

Faith's third grade classroom
Has no mirrors in it
So it's perfect for distracting myself
Away from...myself

I usually just stand on Faith's desk
And practice my positions
While Faith learns addition
Or subtraction
Or...addition

Where was I?

Right, on Faith's desk

And I heard the teacher say something
About introducing a new student

So I turn and look
And wouldn't you know
That standing there
Is the prettiest little girl
I have ever seen

Prettier than the Olovian Sun
Which can only be seen
From the two out of the seven Nuwar planets

And Faith is just devastated
Because right away she knows what I know
Which is that this little girl
Is much, much prettier than her

Oh, you can groan and moan
But I'm trying to help the child accept facts
And facts are facts
And the facts are
That little girl was much prettier than Faith

And by lunch time
None of the boys were talking to Faith
And none of her friends were interested in her day
Or that her parents are getting a divorce
Or that her father is probably seeing a much younger woman named Candy
Or that she's going to throw a party--this party--to get rid of all her imaginary friends

All they care about is the pretty little new girl

So I had to tell her--

'Faith, you just have to learn to stop caring.  As soon as you stop caring about how much prettier the new little girl is, nobody else will either.'

And I told her about the time I was dancing
In the Jupiter ballet
That has recently moved to Neptune
Due to arts funding being cut
All over Jupiter

And I related the story of when a new girl came into the dance company
And I was forced to become the 2nd Prettiest Ballerina in the dance company
And even though I was still the best intergalactic ballerina
It didn't matter
Because I wanted to be the prettiest intergalactic ballerina

So

I acted like I didn't care
And pretty soon I didn't care
And as soon as I didn't care
The new ballerina exploded into a million pieces
And everybody forgot that she even existed
And all was right within the Universe

'But,' said Faith, 'When I don't care, I don't feel right.'

I laughed at how silly she sounded

'Of course you don't feel right,' I said, 'When you stop caring, you're not really a human being anymore.  You're an intergalactic ballerina.  That's why we rule the Universe, Faith, because we don't care and because we don't care we're invincible and it's fantastic!'

I would have kept talking to her
But I still hadn't practiced my leaps
And there was a race of three-horned Fangars on Pluto
That had to be eradicated
With beauty and poise

...And laser guns

A few minutes ago I ran into her
In the grand ballroom
And she looked upset

I wasn't surprised

Between the pretty new girl in school
And her parents divorcing
Faith must be so tempted to care
About all of it

So I told her to remember

Remember not to care

And she said--'Bebe, if I stop caring about the bad stuff.  Won't I have to stop caring about the good stuff, too?'

And you know...

I never thought of it that way

I never thought about the good stuff
Because I was so frightened of the bad stuff

When you've been shot at by Gogorian Warriors
While trying to perform Swan Lake
You start to think that maybe it would be easier
If you just turned off your feelings altogether

But maybe Faith is right

Maybe I have been missing out

I can't remember the last time I enjoyed dancing

I worry so much about doing it perfectly
And not caring about doing it perfectly
And not caring if other people like me
And caring about how much I need to stop caring
About if other people like me
Or think that I'm pretty
Or a good intergalactic ballerina

I worry and worry and worry
And I never stop worrying

Which doesn't sound like not caring at all

So maybe I should start caring

Maybe I should start thinking about the dancing

Because maybe if I do
I can actually remember
Why I love it
So much