JACK: I'm so glad we can finally go out.
PHIL: I am thrilled.
CHRIS: Ecstatic.
JO: It's been too long.
PHIL: So long.
CHRIS: Feels like years!
JACK: So--what are you thinking? You guys want to go out tomorrow?
PHIL: We would love that!
PHIL: We would love that!
CHRIS: We've been stuck inside, and--
PHIL: We're going nuts.
CHRIS: Can you not interrupt me?
PHIL: Sorry.
PHIL: Sorry.
CHRIS: You keep doing that, Phil.
PHIL: I said I was sorry, Chris.
CHRIS: It's--Yes, we'd love to go out.
(A beat.)
JO: That's great! Jack and I were thinking we'd--this is all with social distancing now--
PHIL: Right.
CHRIS: Of course.
JO: We were thinking we'd go to this salad place for some salad.
PHIL: A salad place?
JACK: They only serve salads.
JACK: They only serve salads.
JO: Just salads--and some other apps.
JACK: We love their risotto bites.
JO: Love them.
CHRIS: Do they have entrees?
JACK: No, after you've had your salad, we'll go to this French wine bar--
CHRIS: Is that when we eat?
PHIL: We've already had salads, Chris.
PHIL: We've already had salads, Chris.
CHRIS: I can't get full on salad, Phil.
JO: You don't eat at the wine bar. You have some wine and then you go to the other wine bar.
CHRIS: There are two?
JACK: We've been pent up, Chris.
JO: We want to hit all the spots.
JACK: Every spot.
PHIL: All the spots?
JO: Every one!
PHIL: Wow.
CHRIS: Phil--
PHIL: It's fine, Chris.
JACK: We were thinking after the third wine bar--
CHRIS: There are three now?
JACK: We could go get some bread at the Bread Bar.
JACK: We could go get some bread at the Bread Bar.
CHRIS: Were these things there before the pandemic or--?
JO: After the Bread Bar, it's time to eat.
PHIL: But we've had salads.
CHRIS: And bread.
JACK: And I forgot that the third wine bar does have a lovely olive spread.
PHIL: Wow.
CHRIS: Stop saying 'Wow.'
PHIL: What do you want me to say?
JO: We're taking you to our favorite Greek restaurant.
PHIL: That sounds nice.
JACK: Then we'll go to our favorite dessert place.
CHRIS: Oh boy.
JO: Then another wine bar.
PHIL: Wow.
CHRIS: Phil.
JACK: Then a regular bar--a little Irish pub--to end the night.
JO: We'll have you boys home no later than 5am.
JACK: It's going to be like we're teenagers again!
CHRIS: I was a very sleepy teenager.
JO: What?
PHIL: You know, we, uh, gosh, now that I'm thinking about it, tomorrow is going to be crazy for us.
PHIL: You know, we, uh, gosh, now that I'm thinking about it, tomorrow is going to be crazy for us.
CHRIS: Just, uh, we have so much to do.
JACK: Like what?
PHIL: Um--
CHRIS: We have a--an online--thing.
PHIL: We're watching an opera.
CHRIS: Online.
PHIL: Really--a very--online...opera.
JO: Oh. Well what about the day after?
CHRIS: Right. There are--yeah, so many days, uh--
JO: We can do any day.
JACK: Any day at all.
PHIL: Wow.
CHRIS: Maybe we could, um, break all those, uh, plans up into...like...over the...next...several...years?
JO: What?
PHIL: Just so we don't--run out of places to go.
JACK: There are always places to go.
PHIL: I know, that's the scary part.
CHRIS: We just kind of need to, you know, ease ourselves back into our social lives.
PHIL: You know, because before, we didn't really...have any?
CHRIS: We liked staying in.
CHRIS: We liked staying in.
JO: But you've been complaining about having to stay in.
CHRIS: Well, we love complaining.
PHIL: I mean, that's our favorite thing to do.
CHRIS: We love that.
PHIL: But now, obviously, we need to find, you know, other stuff to complain about.
CHRIS: I don't really love how Phil has our patio set up, but--
PHIL: Could we not?
JACK: You guys should come out! You'll have fun.
JACK: You guys should come out! You'll have fun.
CHRIS: We don't really like fun, Jack.
PHIL: We don't. I mean, we've been having a lot of anxiety--
CHRIS: And we don't like anxiety.
PHIL: We like boredom. I think--all this time when we've been like--We hate how things are now! What we meant is--we'd really love to be bored again.
CHRIS: Right. It might have seemed like we were saying 'Oh, we want to go out and be social!' but really we just--want to stay in.
PHIL: But have the option to go out.
CHRIS: But stay in.
JACK: Wow, well--uh--Jo?
(A beat.)
JO: Thank goodness.
PHIL: What?
JO: We don't want to go out either.
JO: We don't want to go out either.
CHRIS: You don't?
JACK and JO: No!
JACK and JO: No!
JACK: We thought you wanted to.
JO: You think I want to go to a Bread Bar? I'm almost forty.
JACK: We're exhausted. We thought working from home and doing absolutely nothing for months would have us raring to get out there, but it turns out, we're just tired people.
JO: It's who we are.
JACK: Tired.
JO: And very happily tired.
JACK: But we also love to complain.
JO: We should just be complaining about how tired we are.
PHIL: We should try that!
CHRIS: I love that.
PHIL: We could do it together.
CHRIS: Like what we're doing now.
PHIL: From our homes.
CHRIS: At six pm.
JACK: I love that.
JO: Me too.
JACK: Sounds great.
PHIL: Sounds thrilling.
CHRIS: Exciting.
JO: That sounds like a plan.
End of Play
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