Aunt Lucia Does Contact Tracing

Well first I saw my brother, Big Tim

He came over

Because I made soup

And I had so much
You can’t believe

How much soup I made

So I said Tim come over
And I’ll make you a bowl
I’ll put it in the Tupperware

And you can take it home

I left it on the porch for him

And he came by

But he couldn’t find it

And I’m on the other side

Of the door

Trying not to let the droplets in

Screaming at him

That the soup is right there

On the little table

Next to the wicker chairs

And he can’t hear a damn thing

Because he worked

At that drum factory

For all those years

He can’t hear a damn thing

So I had to open the door

And tell him ‘IT’S RIGHT THERE’

But yeah, I might have let

The droplets in

If Tim had the droplets

So he’s on my contact list

My friend Cindy is on the list

Because she came by

And she said ‘I’ll come in. I’ll wear the mask’

So I said ‘Why not? Live a little even if it kills you’

I saw that on a shirt in Atlantic City

And now I say it all the time

Isn’t it cute?

I didn’t buy the shirt

Because it was twelve dollars

And I’m not paying twelve dollars

For a t-shirt

I can get at the dollar store

So Cindy comes by

And she’s sitting there

And we’re talking

And she sneezes

And she’s got the mask on

But she sneezes so hard

The mask goes flying off her face

Little strings holding it on snapped right off

Like old elastic bands

Droplets going everywhere

So I made her a plate of food

And I told her she had to go

But by then the droplets

Are already everywhere

So she’s gotta go

On my list

Mike from down the street

Ran by the house

And I waved

And I think I saw him cough

And I don’t know how far

The droplets travel

But I should put him on the list

Just to be safe

Tim Jr. brought the grandkids by

And they were playing in the front yard

But one of them ran inside

And wanted to hug me

And you think I’m not going to hug

My grandson when he wants a hug?

So I hug the kid

Then Tim Jr. screams at me

And then I tell him we could all be killed

By Bailey’s Comet tomorrow

So what do I care about death for?

Then the grandkids start crying

Because they think I’m gonna die

And I tell them I’m never going to die

Because my family was blessed

By the local strega

Back in the old country

And my mother lived to be a hundred and twelve

So technically I’m middle-aged

Although we don’t really know what her age was

When she died

Because her birth certificate burnt up

In that fire that killed her first husband

And if you asked her about it

She gave you the eye

So you didn’t ask

But anyway

Put the grandkids and Tim Jr. on my list

Um, I went to the deli

And I forgot my mask

So all the people at the deli

And the post office

And the supermarket

And my cousin Franny

Because I wanted to see

What color

She painted her spare room

And the people at PetCo

Because I wanted to see

How much chew toys cost now

Because Franny said it’s gotten out of control

And I don’t have a dog

But I figured I would look into it

And I don’t think it’s out of control

But it was a little high

My husband?

No, I wouldn’t put him on the list

I’ve been making him sleep

In the storm cellar

Since all this started

Well, I mean, geez,

You can’t take any chances

Right?