Good Behavior

The class was totally quiet today

For the whole class

Everything I said

They listened

I told them to do something

They did it

And normally

That would be a good thing

And that would be me

Constituting that

As a good thing

On a good day

If this wasn’t

The fourth time

This has happened so far

And

It’s very difficult for me

To pretend like

This is normal

It’s not normal

For an entire class

To be, just--

So well-behaved

Over and over again

And, in normal

Sorry

I keep saying normal, but--

In other

Normal circumstances

I guess maybe

I would just praise this class

As being, uh,

The best class

That always behaves

And I’d recommend to the--

To the principal

Or something

That we, like,

Acknowledge them

In some way

For being so well-behaved

But I know

You know

I know that…

That’s not what’s going on here

Obviously

There are other things

Going on

But I’m not sure--

I don’t know what

I’m supposed to say

I check in on them

I ask how they’re doing

I even--

I’ve been kind of

Instigating

Not instigating, but--

I’ve been trying, I guess

To get them to, you know

Act a little more

Like...kids?

Like, I’m like--

Hey, you all are so quiet today

Everything all right?

But I know everything

Is not all right

So I don’t push them on it

But should I worry?

Should I worry

That they’re all just sitting there

Listening to me

And doing their work

And everyone’s--

The grades are good

The work is good, but not great

But that’s fine

I still grade it like it’s great

Because I’m not going to expect

Great work right now

But I don’t even care about the work
I care about the fact

That these kids

Are--

These children

Are--

Sitting there

Staring at me

And, you know,

Probably all their other teachers

For hours at a time

Not acting like kids

Does that mean something?

That must mean something, right?

But what’s my job here?

I’m their teacher

I’m not--

I’m not supposed to--

And I have stuff I’m--

So should I try

To do something

Or just--

Just be grateful

That this all

Seems to be

Going so well

When--

When I feel like

There’s a part of it

That’s not?

Like all the things

We used to use

To determine

If something was working?

Those things

Aren’t working

So how do we know

What’s working

And what’s not?

How do we know?

How are we

Supposed

To know?