Hotel Yorba

There was no one

At the front desk

So I just came up

Picked a room

Not mine

But could be, right?

Put my stuff down

Don’t have much stuff

Asked you to lay with me

On the dark green comforter

Or in the tub, if you want

Ever lay in a tub

That hasn’t been used

In awhile?

Feels like a space pod

Like you’re gonna go

All the way up

To space

You ever meet one of those people

Who think they--

They think they know

Everything?

I used to be like that

Until I got slapped on the mouth

By this girl one time

Because I thought I knew her

And I didn’t

And she wanted

To let me know

They don’t put lights

In these rooms

Because they can’t afford

Electricity

Without raising the prices

And nobody minds

Staying in the dark

You ever do that thing

Where you’re sitting in a room

And you’ve been sitting there

For so long

That pretty soon

It’s dark

And you didn’t even know it?

Because it just comes on you

And you’re reading a book

And you can’t read the words

And it’s not because you’re dumb

You just can’t see

You know who thinks

They know everything there is

To know about me?

Yeah, her

She told me I’m a creative escapist

Whatever the fuck that means

Like I’m a magician, I guess

Like I’m Houdini

And I just forgot the rabbit

You could punch him

In the stomach

And he didn’t even feel it

Did you know that?

He didn’t even punch

You back

I was gonna pay for tonight

And then see about tomorrow

But I guess now

I can just pay

When somebody finds out
I’m here

And when they ask

How long I’ve been here

I’ll say ‘I just got here

And there was nobody

At the front desk’

Which isn’t really a lie

Because it depends on

What ‘just got here’ means to you

And there really wasn’t anybody

At the front desk

And you were just walking down the hallway

Not trying to find anybody

And…

And sometimes

That’s how

You get found

I don’t expect anybody

To treat me better

Than I treat myself

But I do expect people

To make things the same for me

And not any worse

If that’s how I feel about it

Do you think you could do that?

Keep it the same?

I just don’t want it

To get any worse

I don’t care if it gets better

I just don’t need it

Getting worse

I’ll pay for tomorrow

If they ask me to

But I’m not paying

For tonight

Not when I’m already here

Not when I’ve already been here

For free