What We Did to Win the War

They asked us what we did

To win the war

When they looked at us

At a crossroads

Two places

Here and there

Where you want to be

And where you’ve been

They asked us about our actions

Our choices

The decisions we made

Late at night

In sterling white offices

In conference rooms

In coffee shops

They asked us if we would do

What we did again

If we have regrets or if we don’t

And if we don’t

Why don’t we?

And what do we think that says

About us?

They asked us about the bombs we dropped

The planes we flew

The bullets we fired

The people we hurt

And not the guilty people either

Not the players in the war

But the bystanders

They ask us if we know their names

The names of those people

They ask us if we know about them

Their names and their lives

And the names of their spouses

And their children

And did we know they had children

And did we know some of them were children

And did we care?

Do we?

Do we care?

They ask us if we could have done things differently

Do we think we could have

Were we ever presented with the opportunity to…

They hold tape recorders in front of our faces

They put us in front of cameras

They show us polls saying—

Here’s what other people think of you

Here’s what you are now

At least, according to the people

Who took these surveys

Who make up these polls

First there’s war

And then there are polls

And then there are pundits

And then there are impassioned speeches

About the wars

You see, first there’s war

And then there are opinions

About war

We didn’t get to have opinions

We had things to do

We had jobs to do

We had wars to win

So other people

Could have

Opinions

We get angry

We get defensive

We scream like maniacs

We pull out our hair

We make excuses

We go home

We have sex with our spouses

Our spouses who have nothing to do with war

Who are consultants

And chefs

And constables

Who ask us why we can’t sleep

And why our blood pressure is so high

And why we don’t look at them anymore

When we’re making love

We spank our children now

We don’t hug them

We give our pets away

Say we don’t have time for them

For pets

For things that need us

We forget to call our relatives

Our friends

We go into work

We never miss a day

Not even when we’re sick

Even though, truthfully, we look like shit

If we were sick we wouldn’t even know it

What would the difference be, we wonder

We sit at our desks

In grey office buildings

In comfortable chairs

Turned towards the windows

So we can see out

So we can take in the spectacular view

This office affords us

Because it’s on the fiftieth floor

Of some grey office building somewhere

And we look out at many other buildings

Many other office buildings

And high rises

And beyond that homes

And small houses

And schools

And hospitals

And bus stops

Where people stand and wait

For a bus to come along

And take them to their job

And their house

And their school

And…wherever

And we try to use this

This view

These things we see

To feel good

About what we did

To win the war