All the Things He Tried to Be Before He Set the Curtains on Fire

First he tried

Writing down his feelings

But his feelings

Would work their way
Around words

And the words

Demanded more clarification

On which way

The feelings

Wanted to go

He didn’t know

And so

He took a box of matches

And lit the old stove

The plan was to make tea

Because tea could subdue him

And place him

In a spot

Where he could gauge

Next steps and better decisions

The bacon sat on the table

Gathering cold

His eggs were floppy

His silverware was rust spotted

His clothes were neatly placed

On his bed

The outside was warm enough

For a nice walk

Around the block

And yet

The thought of putting on sneakers

Or even shoes

Was enough to make him

Want to crawl up the chimney

Like a reverse Santa

Sticking among the brick

Waiting for the smoke

To steam him out

If that’s how that works

He doesn’t know

How anything works

The thought of a chimney

Took him to the fireplace

And once he was there

The thought of a fire

Was enticing to him

But he didn’t start

At the curtains

Instead he went back to the stove

And felt the heat

Of the hearth

Or the cook

Or the cooking

Or the simmer

Or the boil

He wanted to fill the house with it

But the home was old

And seemed to welcome in cold

While snubbing anything

That could be described

As a glow

The only way

To get the place

Tropical

Would be

To inflame

But first he ate his breakfast

To see if that would

Help to deliver him

Some comfort

While no longer hungry

He was also

Not sated

He walked

To every corner

Of every room

Touching walls

Parts of floor

Parts of rugs

Windows

Panes

Glass

Wood

Doorknobs

Faucets

Splintered bits

That try to invade

His layers of skin

Once everything

Had been touched once

He knew it was time

To set the curtains
On fire

He began with the ones

In the living room

The fabric going up easily
As he had hoped

Then the small ones

In the kitchen

Above the sink

They took a bit longer

Because they were cheaper

No use spending much

On kitchen room curtains

The ones in the bedroom

Were the last to go up

But one they did

It felt like they took

The whole house with him

When the fire department arrived

Six or seven minutes later

He was on the lawn

Sipping his tea

And as they ran up to him

Hose in hand

He motioned with his chin

To the house, afire

And said--

‘If I were you

I would check

The chimney’