Divorce Season

We had nearly completely

Forgotten about divorce season

Well, with everything

Going on

You can see how

It would slip our minds

I called Stephen at work

And I said, ‘Stephen, are you aware

That we are already

Two weeks into divorce season?’

I think a part of me

Was hoping he’d say--

‘Marsha, don’t worry

I called the lawyer

And they’re going

To see us on Monday’

But he never thinks

About the future

Which is why

I’m more than happy

To get rid of him

You know, sometimes

Divorce season

Rolls around

And you feel a little bit bad

That you’re splitting up

Because you might like

That particular spouse

Or maybe you’re just apprehensive

About doing engagement season

All over again

With somebody new

To say nothing of

Wedding season

Which I get more and more

Tired of every year

By the time

You’re writing

Your fifth set of vows

And your ninth or tenth

Wedding toast

You are just--

Well, you’re tapped out

That’s what you are

The wedding Stephen and I had

Was so successful

We honestly thought

About just staying together

We talked about it one night

When we having the topiary trimmed

Because we wanted a few more swans

In the side yard

I said, ‘Stephen, I might just stay married to you’

And he, ‘Marsha, I just might stay married to you’

And you know

I think, in that moment

We both believed it

I really think we did

Because some people do

Stay married, you know

Most of us give it a year

And then phone the attorneys

But some people

Do stick it out

Not many people

And those that do

Get talked about, certainly

But some of them

Don’t seem to mind

Being talked about

Well, I guess if

I’m being honest

I would have to say

That both Stephen and I

Very much do not like

Being talked about

Even though, as I’m sure you know,

You get talked about

No matter what you do

But to stay married?

Then what?

Year after year

Season after season

You’re just...married?

No new beaus to debut?

No being the subject of gossip?

No brunches with the wedding planner

Where he informs you

That the theme of every sixth wedding

Needs to be nautical

If you want to make the society pages?

As exhausting as it all is

I can’t imagine

Being on the sidelines of it

Cobwebs growing over my face

As people congratulate me

On my ‘happy marriage’

I mean, can you really?

A happy marriage?

Of course, such things do exist

But not for very long

That’s why it’s important

To keep your eye on the calendar

That way you know

When to call it quits