The 5 Second Rule

I'm sorry, what did you just say?

The 5 Second Rule?

Did you just invoke the 5 Second Rule
To make it okay for you
To eat that macaroon
Right off the floor?

The dirty, disgusting, vile floor?

Yes, I realize it's tile
What's your point?

WHAT'S YOUR POINT?

Do you know what's happened
In the 5 seconds
Since that macaroon
Hit the floor?

Do you realize that bacteria
Moves and grows faster
Than humans do?

Oh sure, to the naked eye
That macaroon
Is totally fine

But what you didn't see
In the 5 seconds
That it was on the floor
Are all the germs
Rushing to inhabit it

Excited at the prospect
Of new terrain

They set up little germ huts
And yurts
And adobe huts

They developed farming
And irrigation
And a tribal hierarchy

They reproduced
And pretty soon
They had a tiny germ village
With a tiny germ train
That could bring them all over the giant new world
Known as the Macaroon

The village grew into a city
And the city became a metropolis
And pretty soon there was germ culture

Germ opera houses
Germ theaters
Germ performance art installation

And then, centuries later
When the germs are erecting statues
Of those first few germs
That were brave enough
To crawl up off the floor
And onto the Macaroon
And begin a new civilization

Suddenly, a hand picks up that macaroon
And eats it
Saying--

'5 Second Rule'

And, not only do you ingest a bacteria-ridden dustball
Though, yes, it was once a tasty treat

You also destroy an entire way of life
And show that you have no concept
Of the flexibility of time

So I hope you're happy with yourself

I hope that macaroon went down
Reaallllll smooth

I hope it was
Delicious

What's that?

Feeling sick

Huh

Aren't we all?