I don’t miss
Santa Barbara
I got in a car
And I got out
Simple as that
Everybody goes--
‘Oh, it’s so beautiful
Such a beautiful place
How could you leave
A place like that?’
You think there aren’t--
I feel like--
Like saying to them--
You think there aren’t
Bad situations
In beautiful places?
You think the nice weather
And the nice houses
And the nice people
Mean you can’t get messed up there?
I woke up every day
Like my chest was on fire
And I’d sit down for breakfast
And my mother would ask me
What was wrong
And I didn’t know
I didn’t know anything
I only knew
That I wanted
A few thousand miles
Between me
And everything else
I was waking up to
Every day
I was choking
On all that good air
Gave myself six weeks
To go as far as I could
And then once I hit Boston
That was it
I landed
Then for years
I heard--
‘Why are you here?’
Why be anywhere?
When you live
Where you were born
People know you
And that made me feel like
I couldn’t ever
Be anyone else
Once you’re in a new place
Day one
You set all the terms
You’re this
You’re that
You’re smart
You’re nice
You’re happy
Because you tell people
You’re happy
And once they believe it
They look at you
Like they believe it
And then you believe it
And that’s how
You get happy
I came from a happy place
Full of happy people
Who all took one look at me
And knew I wasn’t happy
And I was never going to be happy
So it didn’t matter
What I tried to do with myself
They knew who I was going to be
For as long as I was there
So I don’t miss Santa Barbara
I miss the breakfast sandwich
At the place I used to go to
With my Dad on Sunday’s
I miss the choir
At the church
We went to
After breakfast
I miss not knowing
It was February
Because it was too nice out
To think about things
Like seasons
Or time year
But a place is just a place
Is just a place
Is just a place
You can take it
Or leave it
Or leave it all behind
Just depends
On how fast
You’re willing
To drive
And how much
You’re ready
To forget
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