Charlie's Monopoly

Charlie used to play Monopoly with me
Once a week
On Tuesdays

We used to play poker
But neither one of us
Knew how to bluff
So we ended up saying screw it
And stuck to Monopoly

I used to ask after Callie
Charlie's daughter
But I got the impression
That he didn't want to talk about her

That guy couldn't hold onto a personal relationship with somebody
If you attached them to him with bungee cord

That's what I observed anyway

Two failed marriages
Not talking to his kid
Or anybody in his family

No friends
At least none that I knew of
Except for me
And I wasn't much of a friend

Charlie was the personification of the term 'old bastard'

And he was a terrible Monopoly player

Didn't matter how bad of a game I was having
Somehow he would always roll the dice wrong
And land on my only hotel

And you know that the first person to land on a hotel
Is always the one who loses the game

You can fight and fight and fight it
But once you take that first hit
It's all over from there

Because then the strong person gets stronger
And you keep going broke
And before you know it
You're playing just for ceremony

I suggested we switch games
But for some reason
Charlie liked Monopoly

He probably could have beat me at Scrabble
Him being an author and all

I think any game involving actual skill or intelligence
Would have been right up his alley

Luck and strategy--not so much

Charlie and I met up because--

Well...

We met at a meeting

I had some problems a few years back
And I was kind of putting my life back together

Charlie'd had his shit all set for awhile
If you call being alone and miserable
Having your shit all set

At least he wasn't dead, right?

I thought it'd be good to spend time with somebody like that
Somebody who'd stuck with the program
And I figured Charlie would like the company
But most of the time I felt like I was just bothering him
He wouldn't even let me clean up
He used to make me leave first

The week before he died
I went over his house to play some Monopoly
And I wasn't too focused

This woman I was seeing just broke things off with me
And I really, really wanted a fuckin' drink, you know?

Excuse my language
But a drink is a drink
Until you really need it
Then it's a fuckin' drink

And I needed a fuckin' drink

I decided, you know what, screw it
What did I have in my life?

Charlie, that was it

And what did he have?  Nothing

He probably didn't even want me there

So after our game night
I was going to go get drunk

So there I am
Sitting at his kitchen table
Board in front of me
And my hands are shaking so bad
I can't even roll the damn dice

So Charlie snaps at me
Asks what my problem is
And I tell him--

'You're my problem, old man.  Would it kill you to fuckin' smile once in awhile?'

And he looked like I slapped him
Like I slapped him right across the face

Then he got up to go
And I said 'Fine go'
And I picked up the board
And threw it across the room

And that's when I saw the money

All the money stashed under Charlie's side of the board

He'd been slipping it under there
Every time he'd pass go
So he'd never have enough cash on him

I looked at him
But he wouldn't look at me

'You've been throwing the games,' I say

And he says nothing, not a damn thing

No wonder he always made me leave
Before he'd clean up
He didn't want me to see
That he'd been stacking the decks against himself

'I don't get it, Charlie,' I said, 'Why'd you do that?'

He sat down on his little folding chair
Like a little kid
That'd just been caught stealing
And he said--

'I didn't think you needed to lose.'

At first then I didn't get it
Then...

He knew I was going through a rough patch
Probably thought winning something every now and then
Would lift my spirits a little

And maybe he was afraid if he beat me
I'd stop coming back

Or that I'd do something stupid

. . . . .

I didn't go out for that drink

I helped Charlie clean up
Then we played a game of Trivial Pursuit
Then I went home
And stared at my tv

I hadn't paid the cable bill in months
So I was really just staring at the clock
Underneath the tv
But you'd be surprised how entertaining that can be
Compared to what's actually on television nowadays

When I heard Charlie died
I was pretty broken up
But that was also the moment
I knew I was going to make it

If only for him

I figure if somebody throws that many Monopoly games for you
You owe it to them to fight as hard as you can

So you want to know something about Charlie?

Charlie was the only person in my life
Ever made me feel like a winner

And if you knew anything about me
You'd know that's pretty much a miracle