Why Should You Get There Any Sooner Than Me?

Yes, I’m going slow

I’m going slow

Because you’re behind me

Driving like you got

Somewhere to go

Well, I got somewhere to go too

But that doesn’t mean

I’m going to go faster

So you think you can go faster

You will get to where you’re going

After I get to where I’m going

Because I’m in front of you

And there’s an order to how

This is supposed to go

After all, why should you get there any sooner than me?

Because you’re important?
Are you more important than me?
You’re not more important than me

How do I know that?

I don’t

And I don’t care

I don’t care if you are more important

You could be on your way to see your wife

Giving birth in the hospital

And it doesn’t matter

Because you are behind me

And that means

I am getting

Where I need to go

First

That’s how this shook out

That’s how we do things

The person in front of me?

They’re going to get to where they need to go

And do I wish I was in front of them?

Yes

And I’m sure they wish

They were in front of somebody

Somebody’s always wishing

They were in front of somebody else

And there’s nothing wrong with that

It gives us all something

To aspire to

But the reality is

We all are

Where we are

And we’re not going to be anywhere

Other than there

So you speeding up

And driving crazy

And honking your horn

Is just going to make me mad

And making me mad means

I’m going to go slower

And even though that means

I’m going to get where I’m going

Later than I should

It means the natural order of things

Will be protected

Now I realize

You might not have as far to travel as I do

And if that’s the case

It’s all the more reason

For you not to be rushing

Because you’re already

Ahead of the game

But here you are

You’re rushing

And that means

It’s my duty

To slow you down a little bit

Force you to take a deep breath

Consider your life

Consider why you’re racing along

You could get into an accident

You could crash into me

You could kill me

And why?

So you can shave five minutes

Off your travel time?

I get it

Maybe you have to pee

I get that there are reasons

To move at a brisk pace

But nevertheless

I can’t move myself any faster

On your behalf

I just can’t do it

So I hope you’ll forgive me

But the fact is

You’re not getting anywhere

In less time

Because of me

I just can’t let that happen

In fact, I’m going to go a little slower

And--yup, there’s the horn again

Well go ahead and lean on it

Let me know how mad you are

It’s understandable to be mad

When you’re going to be very

Very

Late