I Only Have Myself to Blame

I only have

Myself to blame

I was doing

The card trick

On the train

And someone

Was watching

And I think

They figured out

How to do the trick

I had to follow them

Off the train

And down a few blocks

And stop them

And ask

If they had been watching me

Do the card trick

And they told me ‘No’
But I knew that wasn’t true

Because they were looking at me

The whole time

And, you know,

In the moment

I liked it

Because if you’re doing

A card trick for no one

There’s really

No fun in that

But the trick is--

Huh

The trick is

To do the trick

In such a way

Where nobody

Can watch you
Closely enough

To learn

How to do the trick

Themselves

Because then

Everybody on the train

Is going to be doing card tricks

And then nobody will want

To ride the train anymore

Because it’ll be nothing

But playing cards

Flying all over the place

I can make cards

Fly all over the place

And then the next thing you know

They’re all back in my hand again

And then the next thing you know

They’re a rabbit

And then the next thing you know

There’s no more rabbit

And then the playing cards are back

And see, with that particular trick

Even if you watched me do it

A bunch of times

You probably still couldn’t

Figure it out

Without me teaching it

To you

I probably should have been

Doing that trick on the train

But I was doing

A much easier trick

That you could probably learn

If you were watching

Closely enough

And if, at any point in your life

You happened to know

A magician

And/or study magic

Close enough

For a few years

I didn’t know

The person on the train

So for all I knew

He could have been

An apprentice

To a magician

Back when he was younger

He insisted

That he had never

Studied under a magician

And that he wasn’t even

Watching me on the train

Because he was blind

And I guess I could have

Figured that out

From his sunglasses

And his cane

But I still couldn’t take

Any chances

So I pushed him

Into an open pothole

On the street

And down he went

And now I feel so guilty

Even though

I’m not entirely sure

He’s dead

But if he is dead

I only have

Myself to blame

I never should have

Been practicing

That trick on the train

Next time
I really need

To be more careful

Either I practice it

Fast enough

So that a blind man

Can’t learn it

Or I don’t practice it

At all

Magic is all about

Discipline

And secrecy

Secrecy is also

Kind of

Important