Long Day's Journey Into Night

The day I stopped being able to remember the lines
That’s when I quit

Cold turkey
Like the booze

The booze was easier, actually
When I think about it
If I think about it
Which I don’t
Not often

I garden now
Tell me that’s not depressing

I go to recitals of things
Children’s recitals
I don’t know the children
But they’re lovely all the same

Usually, around this time of year
If you wander into any church basement
You can see some kind of recital

My last show was Long Day’s Journey Into Night

The doped up mother

It was the only role they could give me

Maybe they thought it would be some sort of self-awakening for me

Maybe I did, who knows

It’s possible I slept right through my self-awakening

Truth is, I liked being how I was when I was an actor
It’s not like I was the only one with vices
Working in that theater

Even Beau had his vices
Except his didn’t prevent him
From getting to work on time

I didn’t particularly give a shit
About being a drunken actress

Back then, everybody thought we were all Bohemian nutjobs anyway
So what difference did it make?

But being a retired alcoholic
Just seemed…

Plus, you know
I was alone

The kids had left
And they didn’t visit

My husband was gone
Couldn’t put up with me anymore

All I had was the cat
And the garden
And the sounds of pianos
Played by unfamiliar children

So I quit

I quit it all

And I died a few days after my body
Was pure and clean

Isn’t that something?

I’m not trying to get a message across to you here
That’s not what we’re here for
We’re here to talk about the theater

Well, here’s me talking
About the theater

The theater was my addiction
Not the drinking
The drinking just kept everything that tore at me
A few feet away
So I could tend to my art

So that I could indulge
In my real addiction

Do you understand that?

No, I didn’t think you would