The Dorm

(A dorm room.  VICTOR and JENNY sit together in the common room.)

VICTOR:  There’s something weird about a college during the summertime.  Even one that’s been evacuated because a comet’s going to hit.

JENNY:  We can go somewhere if you want.

VICTOR:  I’m with you.  I’m cool.

(She puts her head on his shoulder.)

JENNY:  On the news, they were surprised there wasn’t rioting.  I mean, there is, some, but not a lot.  Not as much as they thought there’d be.

VICTOR:  Maybe they’re not giving people enough credit.

JENNY:  Did you want to come here because this is where we met or because this is where we’ve spent so much time together over the last year?  And three years before that, before we were, you know.

VICTOR:  None of the above.  I thought a common room in the basement of a dorm was a pretty safe place to be.  No windows—

JENNY:  Honey, try to be romantic.  I need a little romance.  Something.  The world’s ending.

VICTOR:  Want to get married?

JENNY:  No.

VICTOR:  I can find somebody to marry us.  My buddy Turner has one of those online licenses.

JENNY:  I don’t want to move.  I don’t want to get up.  I feel like I’m paralyzed.

VICTOR:  Is it fear?

JENNY:  It’s not fear.  I’m just scared I’ll start to do something and the comet will hit.  I’m scared to commit to anything, even walking across the room, because I don’t want to die not having finished something.  It’s like the most high-stakes game of red-light, green-light ever.

VICTOR:  (Laughs.)  I love you.

JENNY:  I love you too.

(A moment.)

You think I’m silly.

VICTOR:  I like that you’re silly.

JENNY:  But I don’t like that you think that.

VICTOR:  Well, I think that.  What are you going to do?  Poke me?

JENNY:  Wouldn’t be the first time we’ve poked in this common room.

VICTOR:  Talk about things you don’t want to get stopped in the middle of.

JENNY:  Don’t do silly comedian voice.  I hate silly comedian voice.

VICTOR:  I was supposed to have a gig tonight.

JENNY:  I remember.

VICTOR:  I guess silly comedian voice is just kicking in.  My brain must still think it’s showtime.

JENNY:  Tell your brain your girlfriend’s heard all your material.

VICTOR:  At some point, we’re going to have to laugh about this.

JENNY:  Not tonight.

VICTOR:  Tonight might be the only time.

JENNY:  I don’t want to laugh, Victor.

VICTOR:  C’mon, you don’t want to be sad all night.

JENNY:  I don’t know what I want to be.

VICTOR:  Don’t I make you happy?

JENNY:  You make me so happy.

VICTOR:  You make me delirious.  You make me insane with joy.

JENNY:  I was never one of those people who thought a college degree was useless.  But I guess it sort of is now that I have one and I’m never going to get to use it.  Think about everything I could have done over the past four years.  Gotten married to somebody I didn’t love, had a kid I didn’t want, make a life I’d regret.  I could be so much older than I am.

VICTOR:  You think that’d be a good thing?

JENNY:  Well, nobody wants to die young, Victor.

VICTOR:  But if you did all that you never would have met me.

JENNY:  It took you three years just to ask me out for coffee.

VICTOR:  We were friends.  I liked us as friends.

JENNY:  And then—

VICTOR:  There was no ‘And then.’  I always wanted more.  I just thought you didn’t.

JENNY:  I didn’t.  But you grew on me.

VICTOR:  Then one night down here on this couch—

JENNY:  A Saturday night actually—

VICTOR:  A night very much like this one—

JENNY:  I got stood up.

VICTOR:  My show got cancelled.  Pipe burst at the venue.

JENNY:  And we were watching a movie.

VICTOR:  Ordered pizza.

JENNY:  Nobody here but us.

VICTOR:  And you looked at me with this look that said ‘Why aren’t you kissing me, you schmuck?’

JENNY:  And you kissed me.  And I thought—This is incredible.  I’m in a dorm, single, on a Saturday night—the world outside is playing and dancing—and I’m here in a windowless room—and I can’t imagine being happier.

VICTOR:  That was a great first kiss.

JENNY:  It was perfect.

VICTOR:  It seemed like it lasted for a million years and we’re still in it.  It feels like we’re not back at the dorm because we didn’t know where else to go and we knew the emergency door at the back of the building would be open.  It just feels like we’re still in that moment.

JENNY:  Maybe we are.

(He pulls her in tighter.)

But we can’t stay here forever.

VICTOR:  We can try though, right?

JENNY:  Oh, we can try.  We can try for as long as we want.

(They close their eyes.)