Monday, April 8, 2019

Before It Got Bad

They took care of the baby

They sat me down
They...asked for a number

I didn’t know the number

I didn’t know the number
To give them

I didn’t even--

I didn’t even know
What they were talking about
At first, because--

I thought…

I thought maybe
There was a chance
We could work something out

My parents, we--

We all lived
In this little town
By the water

New England
Pretty classic
Pretty standard

And we had this nice window
In the living room
And the curtains were always open
Because it was that kind of town

And it was a beautiful day
And so there was a lot of sun
And, uh, the, the, difference
Between how that day was--

How nice it was

And how it felt…

Sitting on that couch
I think it was a...Thursday

They said they’d--

My dad did most of the talking

So…

But my mom was there

They said they’d take care of the baby
And I thought it meant, like, raise it
While I went to school or--

But that’s not what they meant

I was supposed to go to, um, uh--

College

I had gotten into college

And I thought there was a way I could--

But my dad said ‘No’

He said ‘No’

And he told me
What I was going to do next
And, um, that--

I did that

I went and I--

My mom had to do all the research
Because I didn’t--

I didn’t know anything about it
And, uh--

They paid for the taxi to take me
And take me back
But I had to go alone
And the people at the, um, clinic
Didn’t like that
But I didn’t have any other--

I told them my friend was picking me up
But there was no friend
It was just a taxi

The taxi took me home

That was--a Tuesday

When I got there
My bags were packed
Two suitcases
One was only half-full

My dad was there
My mom wasn’t put

And, uh, he--

He told me to leave

He told me to leave
So I did
And, um, I--

It got really bad
After that

Yeah

Yeah, um…

After that
It got really
Really

Bad

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