An Important Man Drinks Coffee

Everyone, your attention please
I'm going to be sitting here
Drinking coffee
With my laptop open
Doing very important work
And I'd like you all to recognize and respect that
And please try to avoid disturbing me at all costs

I'm sure I look like I could probably dispense sage wisdom
And advise you all on your lives
And relationships
While we sip exotic coffees
And enjoy this mellow atmosphere
But the truth is I just don't have time for that today

This laptop isn't going to do the work for me
Even though it probably could
If I had any idea how to turn it on

Luckily, that just so happens
To be my project for today

I'm going to spend about six hours here
Slowly sipping one cup of coffee
While I figure out how to turn on my laptop
And then tomorrow I'll return
And begin writing a novel
That will be part-Freedom
And part-James and the Giant Peach
But if I'm interrupted on either day
An important piece of American literature
May never be written
And that would be a loss both to mankind
And book clubs all over New England

As you'll notice, I've put up a sign
Here at my table
That says--

'Important Man Drinking Coffee'

That way if any of you simply can't help yourselves
Of you're thrown into a personal crisis
That demands my attention
Like a sudden divorce
Or rapid menopause
You can come up to this sign
And take a number
And depending on where I am
With my computer-on-turning
Or important-book-writing
I will try and assist you
But I make absolutely no promises whatsoever

I thank you for your cooperation
And to answer the question I know you're all asking
I got these glasses at a yard sale
In Portland, Oregon

They were previously owned by a shaman
They're not prescription
And when I wear them for more than an hour
My left eye swells to twice its normal size
But judging by the looks I'm getting
From you members of the fairer sex
I'd say they were worth
All of the eighty-seven dollars
That I gave that hipster voodoo priest

Now, if you'll excuse me
The Great Work is calling, as it were

...By the way, does anyone know the wifi password here?

It's a matter of life
And death