Something You Never Forget

I stopped by to see your grandmother
On the way to the church today

She gripped my hand
And I thought 'Success!'

She's been regressing
First speech, then movement

So a firm grip
And a knowing look in her eye
Means that, for at least today, the regression has halted

I said, Jean, your granddaughter is getting married today
And she looked at me

I wondered what questions
She was asking herself

Do I have a granddaughter?
Have the kids aged?
Whose daughter is she?
Where am I?
Who is this man?

Sometimes I explain things to her
And sometimes I just...

I let her hold my hand
And then she nodded at something
Maybe accepting what it is
I had just told her
And then she said,
Clear as a bell--

'What a cheap suit'

And I thought--

Wow, okay
My wife is still in there
Somewhere

I know you wish she could be here
Maybe you wish we could have...switched

I wasn't prepared to be the leader of a family
Some families have patriarchs
And some are led by the women
I had six girls, so a long time ago
I gave up on having any say about anything
And I just sort of sat on a couch
And drank beer for the better part of twenty years

That's why your mother barely speaks to me
And your aunts treat me like a throw pillow
And you...

Well, you're the eldest grandchild
And by the time your grandma got sick
And I realized that I was going to have to start engaging again
I managed to salvage most of my relationships with the other grandchildren
But you were already, well...grown

I stopped by to see your grandma today
Hoping she'd have a rare moment of clarity
And offer me some advice on marriage
That I could pass along to you

I didn't know anything about marriage
When I married her
And I still don't

Being married to her was like loving peanut butter
It didn't take any effort
It was just pure joy

That's how I felt about her
And that's how I feel about you too

And if that's how you feel about this guy, then well...you're good to go

If not, I have a car out back
And I can have you in Canada
By midnight

She's so proud of you

I never know what's going on inside her head
But today before I left
I said 'Jean, can you believe our little Alice is getting married?'

I said your name and she lit right up

I guess there are some things
You just never forget