Hurlyburly

I find it hysterical

Really, fucking funny, actually

That people have this image

Of, like, what the 70’s were

And what the 80’s were

And the 90’s

And it’s changed, too, you know

It’s really changed

Like in the 90’s

We were nostalgic for the 70’s

And the 80’s seemed scary

Like they were the punishment for the 70’s

And the 60’s were sort of just a precursor

To the awesomeness of the 70’s

And now—

It’s the 80’s we’re nostalgic for

Somehow people think

The 80’s were great

And the 70’s seem too distant to care about

And we think that the 90’s was this really bland time

Because of grunge music

And, like, the confusion

Over what it is we actually were, you know?

We did a lot of drugs in the 90’s

Fuck, I did a lot of drugs in the 90’s

I’ll speak for myself there

But I mean, what else could we do?

Every play that was coming out

Had drugs in it

All the characters were on drugs

So why shouldn’t the actors playing them

Be on drugs?

We did Hurlyburly in 1995

To close the season

And people still talk about that show

They come up and tell me

How they still remember it

I feel like saying ‘Fuck, I was in it

And I don’t even remember it’

There were nights

Where we did more coke offstage

Than onstage

It was insane

It wasn’t fucking bland

I can promise you that

God, I fucking hate being old

The theater is not a good place

To be old in

That’s why I chose to come back

And speak to you

In this much younger form

Maybe I wasn’t a knock-out

But at least I could hang

You know?

I could fucking hang

Everybody in the acting company could

You had to

Otherwise you just burned up and out

Like you were going through the fucking ozone layer, you know?

It was all drugs and sex

And this endless party

That you fell asleep at

And woke up

And suddenly it’s twenty years later

And you’re just like—What?

Like, seriously, what?

Fuck

Those were the days, man

Seriously

Those were the fucking days