Kiss Everybody Here

--  It's sort of my version of "That'll Show Him."  --

I'm going to do it, Marky

I'm going to do it, and you can't stop me

I'm so sick

I'm so sick of your envy

Your nasty, nasty envy

Your putrid, filthy envy

Your mucus-filled envy

Full of bile

Full of insecurity

Full of SHIT!

So you know what I'm going to do?

I'm going to kiss everybody here

Everybody at this birthday party!

I'm kissing Raj

I'm kissing Toshor

I'm kissing Dami

By the way

Who the HELL are my friends dating?

Who are these people?

Where do they find them?

Where?

It doesn't matter

I'm kissing every last one of them

To prove a point

To prove that I can kiss everybody here

And still only love you

You!  My little porcupine

My little hot dog

My little almost-man

I can kiss all these art school weirdoes

With their awful haircuts

And their unbathed bodies

And I can still love you!

I'm going to kiss Puka

If he takes his lip ring out

Which, by the way

Looks infected

I'm going to kiss A'Lani

Who is stunning!

. . . . .

...A woman?

Oh my God

I did not know

Swear to God

So wait

Is Danielle a lesbian?

What's the story with that?

We'll talk later

I'm going to kiss Phillip!

The only normal man here

Besides you, Marky

I'm going to kiss

And kiss him

And kiss him

And maybe then I won't have to kiss

As many of the other guys

To get my point across

No--Forget it

I'm not taking the easy way out

I'm kissing everybody here

And when I'm done

I'm going home with you