Because You Think Your Daughter's Fat

If you're asking me if I think you're a bad mother
Because you think your daughter's fat
Then no, I don't

I think you're a bad mother
For thinking about telling your daughter
That she's fat

Don't tell me you're my sister
Like that means I should support you unconditionally
So what if you're my sister?
She's my niece

And she's a little girl
And quite frankly, I like her better

You call me up and say 'Kate, Joanna's getting too fat'
And you invite me over to discuss it

To discuss it

To discuss your daughter's weight
Instead of just handling it yourself
Which is not like you at all

To ask for my help
With anything having to do with parenting

But now I know why

You want permission
To just come right out
And tell an eight-year-old
That she needs to lose weight
And you want me to tell you that's okay
Because we're not reverting back to the age of parenting
When it was okay to emotionally traumatize our children

We are devolving, because, let's face it
Being good, sensitive, loving parents
Was just too damn hard

My God, Kristin
Fuck you

Yes, fuck you

No, I don't care if Jenny hears
There's a good chance Jenny heard you saying
Her sister is fat
And now she's going to run and tell her
The same way you ran and told me
When you heard Mom say I wasn't as pretty as you were

You know, when I was little
I imagined you growing up to be a lot of awful things
But Mom was not one of them

I at least thought
Seeing how much she fucked me up
You'd try to do better with your daughters
So that neither one of them
Would grow up hating you

Or maybe you don't care

Maybe you only want one daughter on your side
The same way Mom did

Oh please, this has nothing to do with Joanna's health

If you wanted her to get healthy
You'd stop buying all this junk food
That you and Jenny can eat without gaining a pound
Because you're both made of devil blood

And you'd take her outside once in awhile
To do some, you know, activities

Sign her up for the pool at the Y
Teach her to ride a bike

Do something other than sit at a kitchen table
And ask your sister if it's okay
To take the easy way out
And shame her into losing weight

Give her an eating addiction
Or a cutting addiction
Or God know what else

I'm so mad at you
I don't know what to...

Do you realize what you're asking me, Kristin?

You're asking me
If it's okay
To hurt your daughter

That's what you're asking

You're asking for permission
To tell your little girl
That you don't think she's pretty

Look, you don't need my permission for that
If you want to be that kind of mother
Than be my guest

I guess it just means I'm going to have to be
That much better of an aunt