What We Don't Tell the Freshmen

We don't tell them where the dining hall is

And some of them never find out

We don't tell them where Fletcher Hall is

And so those who have been assigned to live there are homeless their freshman year

We don't tell them where the science building is

And so the amount of science majors has fallen over the years

The science building has now become

A Shangri la, a Manderlay, an Atlantis

We don't tell them which professors are easy graders

Because that is a truth that is best stumbled upon like leprechaun's gold

We don't tell them that Tuesday nights on the quad are the best time and place

To get stoned and look at stars and make new friends and truly be young

We don't tell them that any relationship they walked in with

Will melt away like an ice cube on a hot plate

We don't tell them that if they have someone stay over in their dorm room

They will be given a bad reputation that will hang on them like an old shirt forever

We don't tell them that they will never, ever check their school e-mail address

And this will cause them immense stress and hardship

We don't tell them they'll graduate

And we don't tell them they won't graduate

We don't tell them to take a year off

We don't tell them to come back once they have taken a year off

We don't tell them that deadlines can't always be met

We don't tell them that deadlines are about to become the ideal as opposed to the norm

We don't tell them black coffee is no longer something

Only their dads drink

We don't tell them they'll never make as a salary

What they're paying in tuition

We don't tell them that they'll never read

All the books that they're expected to read

We don't tell them that they'll never soak up

All the knowledge they're expected to attain

We don't tell them that they'll never meet

All the people they need to meet

Or have the experience

They came here to have

They can have something like it

But never more than what they expected

We don't tell them that their expectations have to be jettisoned

If they're to exceed them

We don't tell the freshmen that we're rooting for them

Because the support would make them soft

We don't tell them that it'll get easier

Because there's a chance it might not

We don't tell them that this is the beginning of the rest of their lives

Because we now know that life is nothing but beginnings to the very end

We don't tell them what it was like for us

Because it's never the same way for any two people

We don't tell them that you never stop feeling like freshmen

Even when you're holding the degree in your hand

We don't tell them they'll miss home

Because they won't believe they will until they do

We don't tell them a lot of things

Because listening is something you learn to do after freshman year

There's nothing we can tell them

That they don't think they already know

So...we let them go

Find out for themselves

That's what it means to be a freshman

Those lucky, lucky kids