But My Pants Kept Doing That Thing...

I tried to talk to him
But, you know

My pants kept doing that thing
You know

Where they...a little...

And you see a little skin
And you see him seeing it
The skin

And it's nice

I mean, I have a nice body

You know?

But I was trying to talk to him
And he kept looking down

And I kept fixing my pants
And they kept doing that thing

And it's because I've lost weight
Which is, awesome, you know
But I haven't had a chance
To buy new clothes yet

And so my pants are too loose
My tops hang a little bit
And I'm not used to...

I'm just not used to it

Getting looked at?

I'm used to getting looked at

Just not...like that

And I wanted him to talk to me, you know?

Like, stop looking at two inches of skin

Is that more interesting than my eyes?
Than my actual eyes?

I thought that when I finally got people to stop looking at how big I was
They would finally start looking at me
But what's happening instead
Is that they've gone from glancing past me
To guessing how much longer they have to talk to me
Before they can take me home

Oh, and if they find out I was overweight
It's even better

Because then they assume I'm wounded
That I have no type
That I have low self-esteem

Then they go from checking out my ass
To checking their phone
To make sure their roommate is staying at his girlfriend's tonight

It's just...It was so--

I WAS PISSED!

And I couldn't get my pants to, you know
And I couldn't get his attention
So finally, I just said--

Do you wanna fuck?

And he looked at me like, Whoa

Girl just said--

YEAH! Do you want to fuck? Is that what you want?

Uh...Uh...Uh...

He just kept saying

Uh...uh...uh...

And I said Well?

And he said Sure?

And I said--Then next time, remember--the eyes.

You wanna fuck
Pay attention
To my fucking eyes, asshole

And I yanked off my pants
Tossed them over my shoulder like a jacket
And walked out

And damn

DAMN

Ugh

God

I

felt

great