God Doesn't Like You

Last night I got a text from God
Telling me that you were a mess
And done putting up with you
Just generally really fed up
With your bullshit

I guess God had to pick you up
After you got beyond drunk
Again

Which is now a term we use
In the circle
The circle you're clinging to
But which you are quickly becoming
A non-entity in

We say--beyond drunk

Because you're never just drunk
You're always 'beyond drunk'

And we laugh when we say it

Because it's funny
You're laughable
Truly

So God went and picked you up
Then you threw up in the car
Which you always do
Which is why none of us pick you up anymore

And God took you home
And cleaned you up
And put you to bed

And the whole thing took until 4am
At which point God was exhausted
And had to like, be up early the next day
To, I don't know, make a sunrise or something

So the next morning
I call God back
And I'm like--

Why did you pick him up?
You should have left him there

And God's like--

No, I can't
I can't leave him
I'm God

Blah blah blah

And I'm like--

God, none of us like him anymore
You need to just let it go

And God goes--

Yeah, well
I don't like him either very much right now
But I can't let him go

And I kinda realized
It's sort of like God is your Mom
Or like, your Dad

Even when God doesn't like you very much
Which apparently can happen
God still sort of has to love you

Which is a lot more
Than I felt I was required to do

But you know, I think that's a good lesson
Like, obviously I'm not very religious
But to look at, like, things on a greater scale

To look at all of humankind
And say--

You know what?

You don't have to like everyone
You don't have to party with everyone
You don't have to fake smile and be dumb

But you do have to take care of each other

That made me think, you know?

God doesn't like you
But God's also going to stick with you
Until you straighten your shit up

Which I think is admirable

If not really frustrating for God
Because you're such a mess

But maybe next time I'll pick you up

I guess if God can put up with you
Then so can I