Greater Than God

He scrubs it off
The dirt
Off his hands
He has to scrub
To get it all off

He wipes his nose
Runny, sniveling
He can't keep it dry

The rain outside doesn't help
He still feels drenched
From the water outside
And for some reason
He can taste salt on his tongue

Melody's boy came to him late in the day
Asking for a confession
Saying he'd done something bad

He gave him the confession
And when he'd heard what he'd done
He asked Jessica to come see him
See what could be done

She was a spiteful girl
Looking to trap a boy
And she laughed at him
When he suggested
That she give the baby away

'What, Father? You sure you don't just want me to rip it out of myself and throw it in trash?'

Girl had evil in her
That was certain
No baby coming to place in her
Was going to come to anything good

Still he tried to stay calm
He had nine months to reason with her
Melody's boy was a good kid
Going to go to college in the fall
Make something out of himself

When he said this to her, she replied with rage--

'And leave me--ain't that what you mean? Yeah, well, he ain't goin' anyplace. He's going to stay right here with me and the baby unless he can find a way to take us with him.'

That's what this was about
She wanted a free ride

He took her by the shoulders
So frustrated
Trying to talk sense into her

When she slapped him across the face

The move startled him

He was a man of God

Nobody had acted violently towards him
Since he was a child

He slapped her back
And when the blow landed
He regretted it instantly

Thoughts of repercussions ran through his mind
What could happen if she told people
He had struck her

She was not well-liked in town
But rumors were rumors
And they were no good to anybody

Still he told himself later
That none of these thoughts
Were the reason for what happened next

The girl had lost her mind
She jumped on him
And began pelting him with her fists

She hit him near his temple
And he worried that though she was small
She would tear him apart
She seemed to have such fury in her

He was terrified
He remembered those nights when he was a boy
When the blows would land so hard
He'd pass out and wake up to them again

He couldn't push her off
But when she knocked his hand to the ground
He felt the rock
And instinctively it was up
And against the side of her head

And her hands opened
And went limp

At first he didn't see the blood
It poured into the ground first
And then spread out from underneath her

He scrambled away from the body
Wanting to run
Wanting to leave her there

But he knew about evidence
And he knew about investigations
And he knew about what happens
When you panic

So he pulled himself together
And picked up the body
After wrapping the head
So as not to spread anymore blood around
But even then it got all over him
And everything else

Luckily it started to rain
And he took that as a sign
That he was doing the right thing

He brought her to the quarry
To the deep part
Where deep ponds of water
Made the place look almost serene

He threw her in

On the way back
The rain went from a sign and a blessing
To a punishment

The drops became points
Sharp points
Thumbtacks
On his skin

When he got back to the church
He scrubbed at his hands
Recalling that play with the murderer's wife
And how hard she scrubbed

He thought of Melody
The night she came to him
Telling him the boy was coming for confession
Telling him he had to do something
That he had a responsibility

She made him promise to act
Just as she had made him promise
To stay away from the boy
So many years ago

The night they had conceived the boy
It was raining as well

That had been a kinder rain

But he would make peace with this
For his son would have to leave this town
Not just because there was no future here
But because he couldn't bear to see him anymore

He believed that God hated murderers
But it didn't matter
For he believed a promise is the one thing
That's greater than God