If These Shoes Could Speak

If these shoes could speak

They would talk about the party

Where they walked on marble

Making loud clicking noises

Like an important woman

Like a f**king celebrity

Like that, like yeah

If they could speak

They'd say get out of my way

I'm going down carpet now

I'm traveling to Marketing

To fire someone

Just because I can

Just because I want to

Just because it's Monday

Just 'cause, just cause?

Not so much

If they could speak

They'd speak from the heel

And let the tongue roll down

To the toes

To the good stuff

To the bitch

To the filth

To the f**king amazement

Of everyone they walk by

If they could speak

They'd ask for dry rock salt

And sandstone and cobalt

And crazy eights

And cacophony

And cherry red lace lingerie

And a man with a name

That begins with an "R"

If they could speak

They would speak

But they don't

For a reason

Because if these shoes could speak

I doubt you'd want to hear

What they have to say