Okay, children
Line up behind the velvet rope
This is where we stop
For the first lesson
On our educational field trip
"The Velvet Rope and You"
Velvet ropes
Are a sign of acceptance
Many a time, your teacher
Mrs. Brugel
Has been kept behind these velvet ropes
At mean places
That don't appreciate
Inner beauty
But that was before she stumbled onto this lovely establishment
One night after she had been drinking--
--Um, Sprite, drinking lots of Sprite--
And she wound up here
At The Crew Cut
A place where women
Can revel in their womanhood
That's why we had to leave
All the boys in the class
Back in the bus
Well, girls
How does it feel
After centuries
Of being kept underneath the glass ceiling
To finally find a place
Where you and only you are welcome?
THIS is PROGRESS!
Oh! Kara, don't touch that, honey
That's a riding crop
It's used on horses
And...
...Bad horses
That's the dance floor
That's where our bodies express our joy
By joining with music
Creating continuous movement
That translates into physical art
Oh, and that's the Naughty Cage
That's where you go when--
When your joy gets a little too...Joyous
And when you want to experience that joy...with others
That's Lanie
She's the bartender here
A bartender is someone
Who makes drinks for you
Like...
Cranberry juice...and other things
Lanie and I are very, very, very good friends
As a matter of fact
We've been in the Naughty Cage
Quite a few times
Hahahahahahaha
Ohh, you had to be there
GASP!
Girls, look on the wall!
That's me!
That must have been taken
On Curly Cowgirls Night!
See, there I am
Riding the mechanical bull
Without my--
AH! LOOK AWAY!
LOOK AWAY!
Why don't you all just go back to the bus
And wait for me
I'll be out in a second
After I go say 'Hello' to my friend Lanie
...And her friend Deb
And since you've all been SO well-behaved
We can stop at Pizza Hut
On our way back to school
It'll just be our little secret
No comments:
Post a Comment