Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Mozie Freelander Lies About an Allman Brothers Love Triangle

Duane was who I should have chosen
He loved me more
That was easy to see
But Gregg...

Well, with Gregg
There was...

The passion

He used to fly me to secret exotic spots
Around the country

Toledo
Topeka
Boise

Gregg showed me the world

But I wanted more than the world
And that's how I wound up back with Duane

Duane used to play slide guitar
Then bury his face 'tween my lovelies
And every time we'd nearly fall
Right off the picnic table

Yup, Duane loved a good picnic

That was when Gregg came back in the picture
Saying--

'Mozie Freelander, you're marrying me
And if I have to kill my brother to make it happen
Then so be it'

So the two of them had a duel
But luckily both of them were so drunk
They forgot to load the guns

Duane was so out of it
He started yelling 'Bang! Bang!'
And Gregg just peed himself
And fell down into a pile
Of sadness

That was when I left the two of them
And never looked back

Never let it be said
That Mozie Freelander
Destroyed a family

I'll you something though...

I do miss those picnics

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