When I Had My Wisdom Teeth Out

When I had my wisdom teeth out
I realized that I was in love

See, when you have your wisdom teeth out
Somebody has to drive you home

You know, once you're all done
With the surgery

And you're woozy
And out of it
And, hopefully
Really really high on painkillers

So somebody drives you home
And somebody puts you in bed
And you think, you know
This isn't that bad

I'm sleeping
I don't feel anything
My mouth feels lighter
I get a few days out of work
This is...nice

Then the painkillers wear off
And suddenly it feels like
Somebody sat on your face
And then blew up their own ass
Because you're in pain
And you're gross
And blood and saliva is literally pouring out of your mouth
And you're trying to get all of it
Onto some disgusting rag
While you cry
And moan
And wish for death

And, if you're lucky
Somebody's there
Somebody's there through all of that

Loving you anyway

You, utterly disgusting
And whiney
And completely vulnerable
In need

And someone's standing there saying--

Yup, I do
I love you anyway

If you're lucky
Like I said, but it's worth repeating
Lucky

I was lucky

There was somebody there
Holding my drool-y blood cup
And taking care of me

And I looked at this person
Who, up until that point I sort of...doubted
Because, you know, how can you really be sure
That somebody loves you?

When you get your wisdom teeth out
And they stick around for it
That's how

That's how I knew

And when I think of it that way
It seems worth it
The pain
And the saliva bowl
And ass explosion

It all seems worth it
In the end