Charlie Gets Engaged

I was in charge of the ring

That was my only job

I was in charge
Of
The ring

Charlie was bringing his girlfriend
To the restaurant where I worked
To propose to her
And when she went to the ladies room
He gave me the ring
To bring over to the table
So I could put it on this little plate
With a cupcake
Because I guess she loved cupcakes

But then, when the time came
To bring the plate out
With the cupcake
And the ring
I couldn't find the ring

I thought maybe it fell off the plate
So I started walking around the restaurant
Looking for the ring

And the whole time
Charlie is looking at me, like--

'What are you doing?  Why aren't you bringing over the ring?'

And I'm trying to look at him like--

'Dude, I lost your ring.  I'm so sorry.  Please don't let this affect the tip.'

I started crawling under tables
Checking in the fake plants
I even asked a woman to check her linguini
And I nearly got slapped

Finally I could see that Charlie and his girlfriend
Were finished with their food
And they're just waiting for the check
And Charlie's looking at me like--

'Please don't tell me you lost the ring'

And I'm looking at him like--

'Dude, at least she gets a cupcake.'

So I walk over to the table
With the plate
With no ring on it
And I say--

'This guy wants to marry you'

And his girlfriend looks at me like--

'Huh?'

And I go--

'This guy'--and I point to Charlie

'He wants to marry you'

And Charlie just puts his head
Right down on the table
Like--

'Ughhhhhhhhhh'

And his girlfriend goes--

'Where's the ring?'

And I say--

'I lost it'

And she says--

'Is that it on your finger?'

And I look down
And there it is

I put it there so I wouldn't lose it
Isn't that awesome?

His girlfriend accepted the proposal
And everybody in the restaurant clapped and stuff

I heard the marriage didn't last
And I hope it wasn't because
Of me screwing up the proposal

I'll say this for Charlie

He still gave me a really good tip