Paulina Makes a Movie

You there!

Slut Number Five

Put sweater on
To cover your bludingas

They are exposed to world
Like man hanging in public square
For joking about tsar

Paulina did not venture into the perverse and depraved world
Of adult film
Because she was interested
In seeing you in your birthday flute

I merely hope to make quick money
So I can vacation
To glorious, tropical paradise
Of Minnesota

That does not mean this will not be just any sick pornographic film

This will be a sick pornographic film WITH CLASS!

You there!

Man with Unnecessarily Large Pinunu!

If you had that back in old country
We would have sold you to Nikolai Ivenoski's
Traveling Circus
And called you 'Human Ring Toss'

I have no girl here
With large enough booshnita
To accommodate you

Nor am I insured
For such a thing

You must leave immediately

Slut Number Three!

Why are you looking at Slut Number Seven?

Do you wish to engage
In Slut on Slut sexual activity?

I cannot permit such a thing

One of you resembles my third grade teacher Mrs. Ilyitch
And the other resembles Natasha the Stuttering Farm Girl

Watching such a thing
Would bring back too many memories
And Paulina cannot afford to get emotional
On such an important day

This film will be called 'Filthy Sluts and Perverts Realize the Terror of Their Ways and Put Their Clothing Back On'

In front of each of you
There are raincoats
And giant tarps
With which you will cover yourselves
While you stare into the camera
And weep openly
While begging for forgiveness

'Guilty Porn'

It is Paulina's gimmick!

A twitch that has not been filled

I will fill it up
Until I can fill no more!

Pervert Number Eleven!

Why do you seem aroused by my statement?

Ugh...

So many freaks
Working on Paulina's classy smut film

That is last time I hold audition
In the same city
As a Tea Party convention

I wish I were making movie back in Russia
Where we would shoot all the actors
Immediately after filming

Ah well...

QUIET ON SET!

Annnnd...

TRACTION!