Proof

Ten tried to fire me from Proof

Because he found out

I wasn’t the character

I was playing

Or at least

His image of the character

I was playing

These pictures got out

Me

On a website

Leather

Red fingernails

Cat costumes

That kinda thing

And he got all freaked out

Because he thought

I was little miss innocent

So he tried to fire me

Under this bullshit pretext

That there was some morality clause

In the acting company contract

Believe me

There is no

Morality clause

In the acting company

Contract

I once saw two guys take turns

Blowing each other

In the upstairs stairwell

During tech rehearsal

For I Remember Mama

We don’t have morality

Here at the Orpheus Theater

It’s just not on the menu

And I was playing a crazy person

Who might not be all that crazy

So if, in life, I presented a different picture of myself

As opposed to who I am behind closed doors

Couldn’t that almost be considered research?

I said, ‘Tennessee, I know you want to fuck me

And I know that when you do

You want me to be pristine

And virginal

And my actions have ruined

That little fantasy of yours

But trust me, you men need to understand

That there are other

Much better fantasies

Than the innocent schoolgirl

And the naughty Artistic Director’

His face turned the color

Of sour coleslaw

But I did get to stay in the show

Directors always want you to just be real

And so, really, what they want

Is to prevent you from doing your job

Because your job is to act

Not to ‘be real’

Not to ‘bring yourself on stage’

If all any of us wanted to do

Was walk around in front of people

Saying things and doing things

We’d do in our everyday lives

We’d all just take up careers

As homeless people

Instead we act

And when we’re not acting

We’re…

Well, I guess we’re never not acting

But that’s the point, isn’t it?

Isn’t that the whole point?