We're Going Out Tonight

I hit eight red lights on the way here

Eight red lights

Every single light

Between my house and your house

Turned red

As soon as I got near it

But guess what?

We're still going out

Tonight there was a triple feature on--

Breakfast at Tiffany's

An Officer and A Gentleman

And Pretty Woman

Basically

Turner Classic Movies

Begged me to stay home

But guess what?

We're still going out

I broke two nails today

The heel on my favorite shoes came off

My father informed me

That he's marrying a girl

Two years younger than me

But guess what?

We're still going out

I haven't eaten

I am tired

I am decked out

In clothes that smell like chicken nuggets

But we are going out

We're going out tonight

Because we are in our prime

Because our boobs are still perky

Because we don't have boyfriends

Oh please

Your boyfriend's in Michigan

He might as well be invisible

The point is

Just because we have day jobs

And responsibilities

And underlings who report to us

At 7am five days a week

Does NOT mean

That we can't have fun

On a gorgeous night

When we don't have to be up

Early the next day

Remember fun?

Remember when we used to have fun?

Remember when TWO YEARS AGO?

How did we become so boring

In two years?

It takes some people a lifetime

To become boring old women

We've done it

In less time

Than it takes

An elephant to give birth

There should be a baby elephant

Named after our dead social lives

I know I'm just as much to blame as you are

But today I was driving home from work

And I felt something

Something in the air

That feeling

That feeling like it was a good night

Like it could be a good night

You know

When you feel that hum

You drive by restaurants

And you smell great food

And you want to eat it

And not care if it's soaked in fat

When you're not mad

At how bad the roads are

Because it feels like everyone is going somewhere

Going out

Going to a party

Going somewhere you can go too

When you get home

And even your apartment

Your tiny little apartment

That normally welcomes you back

Seems to say--

What are you doing here?

Go out!

That was how I felt tonight

I felt like my life

Was out there

Out in that city

The glowing one

With the lights

The ones we used to dance under

Before we were afraid of getting mugged

We always say that we thought

We were invincible

But do you ever think

That maybe we WERE invincible

BECAUSE we thought we were invincible?

We used to do whatever we wanted

And nothing ever went wrong

Now all I do is what I'm supposed to do

And I wind up with broken heels and a stepmom

Who wants the Jonas Brothers played at her wedding

I don't want to make a fool of myself

I don't want to get arrested

I just want to have fun

I want to dance under the lights again

My whole life

I felt trapped

And neglected

Like there were parties going on

And I couldn't go to them

Because I didn't know where they were

Then I met you

And we became friends

And we became the party

All the parties I ever wanted

Became wherever we were

Then I left the party

And I don't know why

But I don't regret it

I just regret never going back

To see if it was still going on

Maybe that's what I'm scared of

Maybe we're both scared

That we'll go back there

And nobody will remember us

Maybe we're afraid

They turned off the lights

When we weren't looking

But you know what?

We're still going out

Put on your pumps

Push up your boobs

Primp and pull whatever you have to

Whatever you have to do

Because we're going out tonight

Because something telling me

That party wants us back

And I think we owe it

One more night