Smells Like Morning After

The Lord Be With You

Look at all of you
Fine, church-going people
Some of whom went to bed early last night
Just after finishing a rented movie
From your local Redbox

Perhaps you got up early today
Took a nice shower
Got yourself fresh
And came here today
To hear me tell you about the Lord

Well you know what the Lord
Is saying about you?

YOU'RE BORING!

The Lord is looking down on all of you
And it's like he's watching paint dry
On an ugly wall

None of you are LIVING!

It is a Sunday
It is eight am
And some of you have been up for hours

That is INEXCUSABLE!

Why aren't you tired?
Why aren't you hungover?
Why aren't you wearing sunglasses
And asking me to keep it down?

I AM SHOUTING RIGHT NOW
AND NONE OF YOU ARE FLINCHING!

Except Terry's daughter in the third row
The one that walked in
And asked me to

--Quote--

'Make it speedy, so I can go home and try to remember what I did last night'

That girl is sinful
She's disgraced
She's dripping with the devil

But let tell you one thing
She can be forgiven

She can do everything she did last night
Some of which, I would imagine, involved Lester's son
Since they seem to have matching hickeys
And still be FORGIVEN!

So knowing that...

WHY WEREN'T YOU ALL OUT DOING THE SAME THING SHE WAS DOING?

God didn't put you on this earth
To eat oatmeal and scratch your ass
He put here to live and make progress

You go out
You screw up
You kneel down
You pray
You get forgiven
Then you go out
And you screw up all over again!

God's got a job just like all of us
His job is to redeem us
When we decide one more drink
When we already have double vision
Is a dandy idea

And some of you
Are putting our Lord
OUT OF A JOB!

Last night there was a storm
There was a storm that shook this land
And this morning I woke up
And saw the most beautiful thing
I have seen in many, many months

A fresh clean landscape
Beaten and bruised
But still here

Still taking in the sunlight
And dusting itself off
And ready to go again

The only way to get that way
To be that strong and resilient
Is to go out in that storm
And let the world shake you up a little bit

So next Sunday
When I show up here
I better smell some morning after

Am I understood?

Then can I have an amen?