It wasn't a good idea
Let's put it that way
It was NOT a good idea
To think you could fuck with me
Because you see
You didn't just fuck with me
You fucked with an army
You fucked with an Spanish soccer team
You fucked with the wrong woman
I'm not going to sass you
I'm not going to slap you around
I'm not going to bother with starting rumors about you
And wait for them to circulate
I'm going to rip your fucking house out of the ground
And slam it down on your entire fucking family
I'm going to throw a cow at you
I'm going to pick up your white trash truck
And throw it through the window
Of whatever church
Has the unpleasant distinction
Of being your place of worship
I'm going to eat your children's pet lizards
I'm going to pour ketchup on them
And let them drown in it
Then gobble them up on wheat bread
So I don't spoil my diet
I'm going to decimate acres
Behind and in front of you
So that the last thing you see
Before you get slammed eight feet into the ground
Is land as barren and torn apart
As your miserable life
Do NOT think you can fuck with me
Because I am not just me
I am a motherfucking tornado
So the next time you don't feel like inviting my daughter
To your daughter's house for a slumber party
I'd watch the Discovery Channel for a few hours
And then think again
I'll be dropping Chrissy off at seven
Oh, and by the way
She has the night terrors
Good luck with that
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