Snow White Might Gossip

Oooohhhh just sit down

Just sit yourself down
Have some pie
I made pie
Do you like pie?

You can put your apple on the table
I'll eat it later
Or give it to Happy

Fat Bitch needs some more fruit in his diet

You know how many times I've bought devil dogs for MYself?
Not for anybody else, but for me?
Because I need a chocolate nap
Every now and again?

And that Fat Bitch eats 'em all
That's why he's so damn happy all the time

I'd be happy too if I was on a sugar high
Twenty-four seven

Here, use this hand sanitizer
Before you touch that spoon
Snotty sneezed all over it
Just like everything else

I have to clean this house eight times a day
Because Perma-Flu won't carry a handkerchief around with him

Watch me come down with hepatitis
Just you watch

Then we got Doc who ain't a doctor
I told my friends I was living with a doctor
But he ain't no doctor

They call him Doc because he used to work down at the shipyard
Until they caught him there with a twelve-year-old girl named Patty
Dressed her up like Shirley Temple with the little sailor hat and everything

Fucked up
Realllll fucked up

That's whose bowl I'm washing
Tell me that ain't wrong

Then we got PMS, always grumpy
Asking me if I ate his wheat bread

I told him, Bitch, I didn't eat your wheat bread
Why don't you ask Fat Bitch if he ate it
Along with everything else in the house?

Giving me nasty looks, thinks I don't see
One of these days there's going to be a tussle
And he don't wanna tussle with me

I'll pull that little hat down over his scrawny little ass
And push him into the well
That's what I'll do

Oh, don't mind him
He's stupid

They call him bashful
But where I'm from
That means you're slow

Sometimes I throw bread crumbs at him
To see if he'll move
But he never does

Now he's got birds eating off his head
Might as well be a water fountain

Now Dummy, he ain't no dummy
He's too damn smart, let me tell you
Because he makes that little face of his
And next thing you know
I'm crawling into that little bed with him
Getting all cozy

And it ain't right
But it is what it is
You know what I'm saying?

Dumb men do it better
But he ain't dumb
Because he knows I love that stupid little grin

All right, I gotta go
Gotta wake up Lazy Ass
He'd sleep all day if I let him
But you bet your ass I ain't lettin' him

He ain't narcopepto
He's just laaaaaazy

Should have stayed with that bitch of a stepmother
Taken my chances

'Round here I gotta break some bad habits
But don't worry, I'll break 'em

I don't like to gossip
But I do like the truth
I just LOVE the truth

So I'll break 'em

I'll break 'em all
And the first thing I gotta do
Is get them all

Some brand new names