Alice in the Ladies Room

Dinah, stop moving

I know you're standing still
But it looks like you're moving
So could you stop?

Could you stop doing whatever it is you're doing
That's making my eyes think
You're moving?

Ugh, I'm going to be sick

I don't want to be sick in here

If I'm sick in a public restroom
The thought of being sick in a public restroom
Is going to make me even sicker

Help me, Dinah
I don't want to vomit on my own vomit

I never should have taken that pill

It said right on it--'Eat Me and You'll Throw Up a Lot and Want to Die'

But I thought maybe it was ironic
Or something

My arm is so cold

I can't pull it inside, Dinah
I'm huge now
I'm the size of a house

I have to stick my arm outside
Just to fit in this tiny ladies room

OCCUPIED!  THIS RESTROOM IS OCCUPIED!
GO PEE BEHIND THE BAR!

Dinah, my head is spinning
And I smell pepper

Do you smell pepper?

Why are you wearing that hat?
And why are you pouring me tea?
And why are you covered in fur?

I never should have followed Lewis here

I was hoping I'd find him here by himself
Realizing what an idiot he is
For ruining a good thing

But instead he's out on the dance floor
Going at it with every girl who comes near him
And so when some guy comes up to me
With a pill in his hand, I think--

Why not?

Now I'm the size of a carnival ride
And every time I look in the mirror
There's a iguana with wings staring back at me

YES, I SEE YOU, IGUANA
BUT I'M A LITTLE OUT OF IT RIGHT NOW!
WE CAN PLAY DODGEBALL LATER!

Dinah, do something

I'm falling

I'm falling past Lewis
And you
And everybody in the club

I'm falling past armchairs
And bookcases
And miniature versions of myself

I'm falling, Dinah

And I'm scared to look down
Because what if--

What if I can't see
Where I'm going to land?